Wednesday, June 30, 2010

So ready for UNH Hockey

By: Lady Meow

Seriously, I cannot wait! I'm armed with my jersey and heels. What more do you need besides alcohol in your system and your voice for those UNH Hockey Chants?

I'm currently creating a guide for freshman girls at UNH. Inspired by the amazing New Hampshirite. It should be up by July sometime, meanwhile, I have better things to do like enjoying the summer and having multiple orgasms.

Get psyched yo! xoxo<3


Newcomers can follow me on twatter (twitter) add me on facebook!

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Surviving UNH: An Orientation Guide to life at UNH

Note: "Surviving UNH" is intended to be like a Wikipedia page of life at UNH; feel free to submit any corrections or additional info you think I may have left out. I know this is far from perfect or complete and I want this to continue to grow over the years through the help of fellow students.

To read the entire guide, click here or the "Surviving UNH" tab at the top of the blog.

Thanks and feedback, comments, criticism is welcome!

UNH Hockey Chants

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Peter LeBlanc scores a game winner over Vermont. Somewhere in the crowd the New Hampshirite rejoices.

NOTE: Most of these chants are pretty generic across college hockey, but there are so many of them that I felt they should be listed for newcomers. I’m sure that there are several chants that I forgot out or misremembered so be sure to comment below and I will add or correct them. (Changes will be made to the page version. See tab at the top of the blog.)

Hockey East Team Specific Chants:
Boston University: Screw BU. Screw BU. Screw BU…
Sucks to B-U, Sucks to B-U, Sucks to B-U…
“Mad Dog” after penalties
Boston College: If you can’t get into Harvard go BC. If you can’t get into Harvard go BC. If you can’t get into Harvard ‘cause your borderline retarded, if you can’t get into Harvard go BC.
Harvard rejects!
Rough ‘em up; rough ‘em up BC Sucks! (You may substitute “fuck” for “rough”)
University of Maine: M-A-I-N-E Maaaaaaiiiiiiinnnne SUCKS!
If you can’t get into college go to Maine. If you can’t get into college go to Maine. If you can’t get into college ‘cause you lack the basic knowledge, if you can’t get into college go to Maine.
The wheels on your house go round and round, round and round, round and round…
University of Massachusetts: (all Boston area schools: Warm up yah cah!)*
UMass Lowell: Amherst rejects!
Merrimack College:*
Northeastern: “Mad dog” after penalties *
Providence: “10 Hail Mary’s” after penalties *
Vermont: Dirty Hippies…
*It's been a while, do we have specific chants for UMass, MC, NE, PC?
Penalties:
When an opponent receives a penalty: Skate, skate, skate… sit down bitch!
Vs teams with K9 mascot: (BU, Northeastern) Mad dog! Mad dog! Mad Dog…
Vs Catholic schools: (BC, Providence) 10 Hail Mary’s, 10 Hail Mary’s…
UNH on Penalty Kill: (call back) O-R-G-Y,  (what’s spell) orgy (what’s that mean?) Teamwork…
Two men down: (call back) C-O-N-D-O-M (what’s that mean?) defense, defense, defense
Power play: (call back) S-E-X, sex, sex, sex, (what’s that mean?) score, score, score…

Need for better offense:
 P-U-T-I-T-I-N. Put it in!
Call back: EX-LAX (what’s that mean?) Go! Go! Go...

Generic:
Cowbell at start of period/following face-off after a goal: Go, Fight, Win.
Go Cat’s Go!...
Gimme a U… N…H  what’s that spell? (Uhhh) Girls only (Uhhh) Guys only (Uhhh) Let’s feel it! (UUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhh!)
Go Blue/Go White (alternating sides of the student section)’
With 1:05 left in a period: Hey, (scorekeeper-usually “John”) how much time is left? John: 1 minute left to play in the period. Crowd: Thank you! 
End of game, superfans have cue cards for 3 sections: Beat ‘em! Smash ‘em! Break his face! (x3) All sections: Rip of his arms and legs and beat him with the bloody stumps, UNH!

Opponent’s Goalie:
Referred to as a “sieve.” This will be used throughout a game, often substituted in songs played by the band. Ex: Hey (goalie name) I wanna know. Will you be my sieve?
Takes of his mask: Ugly goalie, ugly goalie, ugly goalie…
Hey (goalie name), here comes the hex, ooooohhhhhh! (2nd period is the long-distance hex).
Empty Net: Better goalie, better goalie, better goalie...
Goalie leave crease (usually for a timeout): empty net, empty net, empty net, (goalie returns) still an empty net, still an empty net, still an empty net!

UNH Goalie:
2nd period when he’s in front of the student section: Hey (name), we’re all behind you!

Poor Refereeing:
A rope. A tree. Hang the referee…
I’m blind, I’m deaf, I wanna be a ref…

End of a blowout win:
Warm up the bus… (“Yah cah” for Boston/Mass teams, plane for a distant team)
Is that not the ice down there? Yes that is the ice down there! Is that not the scoreboard there? Yes that is the scoreboard there! Is that not the winning team? Yes that in the winning team! And is that no the losing team? Yes that is the losing team! Winning team, losing team, winning team, losing team, winning team, losing team… UNH, UNH, UNH.

Friday, June 18, 2010

Ahoy-hoy!

Did you know that telephone inventor Alexander Graham Bell initially wanted the telephone greeting to be "Ahoy," but it was Thomas Edison who suggested "Hello?" This has been another useless piece of history trivia from the New Hampshirite. Where would you be without me?

Anyways, I finally got wireless internet at my house, which means that I can use my laptop and not my parent's old piece of junk. Hopefully this will lead to a few more summer posts, but no promises. I am extremely close to being done with my "Surviving UNH" guide, which is turning into mix between a wikipedia of life at UNH and my own personal orientation guide.

I would like to mention that former blogger Corey has moved on and started up a blog of his own. Although, now that he is in the real world some of his writing might be over our college-student heads. In all seriousness, he really is a great writer and if you enjoyed what he did here your should definitely check out "transmissions from the woods." Hopefully he will still dip in here from time to time and I know we plan on bouncing ideas off each other so even if he isn't writing here, his presence will still be felt.

I have also been getting a few emails now and again and instead of replying to them I have decided to turn them into a "mailbag" type of post. The first is yet another UNH rap, which really got me excited because my favorite type of music is amateur rapping over garage band.


I will admit, that had a few decent lines in it. I enjoyed the jab about only winning Hockey East and it was far superior than the DHop rap (which would have been better if it was a joke). Once the semester starts up we may have to do a poll on the "best" (or worst?) UNH anthem. Whatever, I know these videos aren't great, but for UNH students I definitely see how they can be enjoyable.

I also recently stumbled across a site that could come in handy when it comes time for back to school shopping or for anyone looking to purchase a few items for an apartment or something. (And by stumble across I mean a friend of mine is doing an internship for them and he emailed me.) Anyways, it is called Pricefalls.com, which is kind of similar to ebay and they actually do have some decent deals on appliances. So check that out if you're interested. According to their website their "prices are constantly falling! Watch the timer, and every few seconds the price will flash showing that the cost of the item has dropped by a predetermined amount."

This email came from "John."
"I think it is terrible that you made fun of Scott Darling for getting kicked off the Maine hockey team. He has a problem and you don't have to turn it into a laughing matter."

This reminds me of that South Park episode where Stan's dad has alcoholism and uses the whole "it is a disease" excuse. Ah, good ole' South Park. Let's face it, most college students drink and some like to drink a lot, but if I was getting a full ride to play highly competitive DI hockey, I would make a few priorities. Showing up to practice not hungover would be towards the top of that list.

This email came from "Kyle."
"I just graduated high school and I'm coming to UNH in the fall. You seem to know a lot about UNH so I was hoping you could answer a question for me. What's the deal with the dining hall food? It seemed decent when I visited, but I've heard mixed things, should I plan on brining a lot of food to make on my own?"

The dining halls are actually pretty decent, especially compared to other schools. I hardly make my own food at school, but I usually keep a bunch of snack type items. You can't really make food apart from with microwaves in the dorms, but the food really shouldn't be an issue.

The final email came from "Sarah."
"New Hampshirite, you're so funny and I can tell that you're good at sex. We should make sex acts together when school starts up again."

Okay.

Fine, I will admit one of those emails was made up, but I won't say which one. For the next semester I'd like to get more reader feedback, emails, comments and that sort of stuff so please don't be shy. That is all for now, be sure to check back soon for when I finish the orientation guide.

Stay classy, not UMassy.

Sunday, June 13, 2010

Oh my Darling!

That puck probably went 5-hole, however if it was a beer he'd have it covered up.

Maine recently announced that goalie Scott Darling will not be returning to the team following his third suspension in two seasons. Although the suspension was listed as violating the "school's code of conduct", it isn't a secret that he had several alcohol related incidences. Maine has two incoming goalies, including Martin Ouellette, who is considered a top goalie prospect. I think it is safe to say that when Maine visits the Whit this fall chants of "Where is Darling?" will be prominent. I apologize for this bad pun: Someone should have told him it's the Maine Black Bears, not the "blackouts." Although if I went to Maine, I'd probably want to be blacked out all the time too...


I'm currently compiling a list of all the hockey chants for the upcoming season. I know it is a ways off, but I can't wait for the season to start!

Friday, June 4, 2010

Summer Updates

Well it is a few weeks into the summer and as much as I enjoy driving a tractor for work and fishing almost every afternoon or evening I do miss Dirty Durham. What can I say? I love UNH. I must say it is nice actually having some money and I already have a dead sexy farmer’s tan… but I can’t wait to move into the Gables in the fall. Shit show 24/7. I mean my parent’s new house is pretty sick so I am far from roughing it, but let’s just say I have a little more freedom at school.  I’m working in a tree nursery this summer and it is a pretty sweet job, basically I drive a tractor, water, weed-whack and dig holes all day. It beats working at Stop and Shop or the mini-golf course I used to slave at over near Hampton Beach (can you say worst job ever? Dealing with tourists is miserable.)

UNH men’s hockey released their schedule for the upcoming season and I can’t wait for the games to start. The start off with two at Miami-Ohio, who beat and tied us last year at the Whit. Then we host Michigan, who has always been one of my favorite athletic colleges. It should be a great match-up featuring the two schools who have the longest active run of consecutive NCAA tournament appearances. UNH also faces Cornell who they split two games with last season, UNH’s win came in the opening round of the NCAAs. UNH also hosts Maine twice at the Whit, which is awesome because usually one of those games is played at the Verizon Center in Manchester.

Right now I am working on a "Surviving UNH" guide, which will be directed mostly towards incoming and freshman students. It will be a work-in-progress and probably become its own page at the top of the blog. (Where you can click About Us, Disclaimer, etc...) I'm hoping to cover many different aspects of life at UNH and it is a combination of old and new stuff. It is already three pages single-spaced and I have many more things to cover. Once it is added I am hoping to get some feedback and tips to make it better and more accurate.

Enjoy the rest of your summer.
Stay classy, not UMassy.

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Best Craigslist Missed Connection Ad Ever: UNH Graduation - w4m - 22 (Durham)

Craigslist: Through all these years at UNH, I can't believe I missed you. After somehow overlooking you for so long, you really took my breath away at our graduation ceremony when you showed up with nothing but white shorts underneath your robe. I thought it was just so attractive that you were utterly wasted and kept standing on your chair, thrusting your pelvis like you were in a Ke$ha video. Your hot pink sunglasses and Reef flip flops really accented your whole look, too. As turned on as I was, however, I DO wish you'd washed your feet for the occasion.

I could barely focus on the speaker, since every time you shouted something like "YAH BRAAAH" or "FACCKINNN U S AAAA" I got so turned on that I forgot what he was saying. But it doesn't matter; what deeper message I might have left with pales in comparison to your RIPPED ABBZ!! Your Jersey-Shore-esque tan was great too. I'm a sucker for a loud mouth and orange skin.

When each sub-section of UNH's graduating class stood, I was thrilled to discover you, along with the rest of your charming friends, were a business major. Well baby, you can run MY business anytime, if you know what I mean.

Please, let me be your trophy housewife. You're so overwhelmingly, exquisitely MANLY, and I don't know if I can contain my animalistic attraction to you any longer.

Holy fuck that was gold, there really isn't much I need to add. I wasn't planning on posting anything for a few days but then I came across this little treat. (...and no I wasn't looking through missed connections for any local ladies who may have seen me driving a tractor with my shirt off...) Anyways, I think this is great. Obviously it is highly sacrcastic, but I really need to know if a female actually wrote this because if so I am in love. I fucking love how this person was so pissed over that guy that they wrote a fucking ad on Craigslist! Did they think that this guy would read this and realize what a douche he is? Because if he were to read this his douchebagosicity would probably prevent him from getting the sarcasim and it would probably only make him act even more douchy. I bet he pregamed to graduation by "Icing" his bros and listening to Sam Adams... sorry, it was too easy. Whatever, I got a laugh out of this add and I may have to read Craiglist stuff more often.

Stay classy, not UMassy.