Not as good as Jay-Z's but it's way better than the Boston College version:
Stay classy, not UMassy.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Granite State of Mind
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Making a Beirut table
If you are able to read through this post there is pretty big announcement at the end. So at least read that. This post is directed to those still living in dorms.
Dorm life can actually be pretty fun, but when it comes to the weekends it can be a pain in the ass. When living in dorms it is important to make the best out of your situation. I think you all know what I am talking about: getting very drunk. While a good ole' fashion dorm party can be fun, it is better to have someplace else to go. Sometimes that can be tricky, especially for underclassmen, so it is always important to be prepared for a night in the dorm. The best way to turn your dorm room into a fun place to chill (or even better for pre-gaming before you go out) is to make yourself a makeshift Beirut table. Not everyone can afford one of those collapsable tables and regular tables take up too much space.
If you live in Williamson or Christianson the cork boards on your wall can be much more useful than to hang a calender or poster or the volleyball team. All you need is a phillips head screwdriver and wahla you have a flat surface for a table top. Next you need something to stack, milk crates work well, but my freshman year (in big Willy) my roommate and I found that our plastic tubs for storage worked perfectly. Now, the table will be kind of short, so a strip of duct tape or any type of line can be used to keep the shooter from leaning to far over. (The elbow rule doesn't work on a four foot table.)
I haven't noticed the cork boards in many other dorms so without a decently sized one (that's what she said) you'll have to look in other places. You don't want something gross, but dumpster diving should never be ruled out. My current roommate and I found a perfectly good (but wobbly) TV stand next to a dumpster. (I swear it wasn't in it.) If worst comes to worst you can always head over to Home Depot and grab a new piece of plywood. Throw some paint or graffiti on it and you have a perfectly decent dorm room Beirut table.
Now for a pretty big announcement. As I said yesterday was the big one year anniversary and my original plans fell through (can't say what they were because it could be reworked for the future), but some last minute negotiations has lead to something different. You may have noticed a new writer joined the blog yesterday, Mr. Corey Nachman, who boldly chose to use his real name. Corey and I have collaborated a few times in the past (UNH Bucketlist) and he brings some nice writing and real-world experience to the blog. Corey will have his debut post up tomorrow.
We also have another writer scheduled to join the team by the weekend. She, (that's right she) was the first person to contact me about writing. She sent in a funny email with great ideas and a sample of writing and I think having a female voice on the blog could greatly expand our audience and variety. She plans on writing about once a week so these are just subtle changes that could really help improve the blog. I am still going to write the same as always so it will be like having some bonus posts.
Stay classy, not UMassy.
Dorm life can actually be pretty fun, but when it comes to the weekends it can be a pain in the ass. When living in dorms it is important to make the best out of your situation. I think you all know what I am talking about: getting very drunk. While a good ole' fashion dorm party can be fun, it is better to have someplace else to go. Sometimes that can be tricky, especially for underclassmen, so it is always important to be prepared for a night in the dorm. The best way to turn your dorm room into a fun place to chill (or even better for pre-gaming before you go out) is to make yourself a makeshift Beirut table. Not everyone can afford one of those collapsable tables and regular tables take up too much space.
If you live in Williamson or Christianson the cork boards on your wall can be much more useful than to hang a calender or poster or the volleyball team. All you need is a phillips head screwdriver and wahla you have a flat surface for a table top. Next you need something to stack, milk crates work well, but my freshman year (in big Willy) my roommate and I found that our plastic tubs for storage worked perfectly. Now, the table will be kind of short, so a strip of duct tape or any type of line can be used to keep the shooter from leaning to far over. (The elbow rule doesn't work on a four foot table.)
I haven't noticed the cork boards in many other dorms so without a decently sized one (that's what she said) you'll have to look in other places. You don't want something gross, but dumpster diving should never be ruled out. My current roommate and I found a perfectly good (but wobbly) TV stand next to a dumpster. (I swear it wasn't in it.) If worst comes to worst you can always head over to Home Depot and grab a new piece of plywood. Throw some paint or graffiti on it and you have a perfectly decent dorm room Beirut table.
Now for a pretty big announcement. As I said yesterday was the big one year anniversary and my original plans fell through (can't say what they were because it could be reworked for the future), but some last minute negotiations has lead to something different. You may have noticed a new writer joined the blog yesterday, Mr. Corey Nachman, who boldly chose to use his real name. Corey and I have collaborated a few times in the past (UNH Bucketlist) and he brings some nice writing and real-world experience to the blog. Corey will have his debut post up tomorrow.
We also have another writer scheduled to join the team by the weekend. She, (that's right she) was the first person to contact me about writing. She sent in a funny email with great ideas and a sample of writing and I think having a female voice on the blog could greatly expand our audience and variety. She plans on writing about once a week so these are just subtle changes that could really help improve the blog. I am still going to write the same as always so it will be like having some bonus posts.
Stay classy, not UMassy.
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
One Year
Wow. I wasn't planning on writing anything about today being the one year anniversary of the blog, but there is one thing I would like to say: Thank you. Thank you to everyone who has ever read the blog, to anyone who as ever encouraged me to keep it up, to anyone who has ever commented on a post, to anyone who has ever emailed me and told me how much they hate the blog and think that I am worthless, to anyone who has ever provided inspiration, to anyone who has ever fed me a tip, to anyone who has ever told a friend about the blog, to anyone who I have pissed off and they still continue to read. Thank you. There is no way this blog would have lasted without the people who read it everyday. I would like to send out a special thanks to the UNH cops, dining and SCOPE for providing great material. Keep it up, please! The most important thanks definitely goes out to those at TNH. The funny thing is I think they only discovered me because one of my first posts was about how they ran too much world news and not enough UNH news and that night I received a comment from last year's executive editor. I have gotten to know a few of them pretty well and the paper is in very good hands for the next two years. Working with them has been a great experience and I am looking forward to continue to work with them. I would like to say that I have a big surprise video or post or something but that is not going to happen. Maybe next year when I'm not in a dorm I'll throw a blog party, but all I can do now is say thanks again.
Stay classy, not UMassy.
(I promise to never write anything so cheesy again.)
Stay classy, not UMassy.
(I promise to never write anything so cheesy again.)
Like a Pro: Comin' Down the Homestretch
My fellow UNH students, today is March 30, which means two things. First, it is the one-year anniversary of my blog – approximately 364 days more than I thought it would last – but more importantly there are only 40 days until finals week. That means that there are only six weekends left to study and prepare for exams. And by “study and prepare” you should very well know by now that I mean weekends left to party. This is college, the weather is getting nice in Durham and soon it will be summer vacation.
To me, summer vacation means that I’ll be waking up three hours earlier every day and working outside in hot and humid weather. Don’t get me wrong, I love that I get to work outside, but I rather enjoy being at UNH. If you ask me, I am already on vacation because I get to sleep in every day of the week and hangout and relax almost every night. Sure, I go to classes during the day and I have a lot of homework, but with proper time-management college is actually not too bad. Although I am writing this at midnight on a Sunday because I watched cartoons all day, that is not the point. Because I forgot what the point of this column was halfway through that paragraph. Is it possible to catch ADD this late in life?
Let me try and get back on track. You know that old saying, “There is a time and a place for that and it is called college”? Well, we are in college, so that time and place is right now. Have fun. Enjoy yourselves now because before you know it, you’ll be in the real world with infinitely more responsibilities.
Speaking of having fun, what could be more fun than eating a burrito at two in the morning? Well you are in luck because Irie Taco has started its late-night hours. I’m taking credit for it because I recommended this to the owner the first time I went and he said he would think about it. You welcome, UNH. Their chicken burrito could very well rival Kurt’s cheesy fries and D-Hop slices as my top choice for third-dinner. Irie Taco is located at the loop next to the Mills and behind Huddleston Hall.
Speaking of the name Huddleston, thanks to Twitter I have a whole new appreciation for our university’s president. I call them Huddletweets. His tweets really show how much time goes into running UNH from attending meetings to giving lectures to mid-morning runs to IHOP. So really, apart from attending lectures and meetings, we aren’t so different.<
I would also like to take this opportunity to make a few quick announcements. On Tuesday and Thursday of this week there will be a table in the MUB from 12:40 to 2:00 p.m. looking for student signatures in support of a Good Samaritan policy at UNH. This is something that really could make a difference on campus in regards to the safety of students so please take a moment this week to sign the petition.
While on the topic of politics, the past few years there has been a terribly low voter turnout for student senate elections. These are the students who help make changes for the better of the student body. So if you’re like me and you really support a cause on campus, such as a Good Samaritan or medical amnesty policy, this year’s voting may be more important then ever before. So make sure you remember to vote on April 20. Wait, what? Yes, that’s right, this year’s student senate elections are on 4/20. To the people who don’t see the problem with that date, thank you in advance for remembering to vote. Although, this could be a giant conspiracy: I mean if only 5 percent of campus votes, will the winners actually get elected? We need to find out who decided on this date and check to see if they are on the ballot. Something smells funny here and it isn’t the room down the hall blasting Bob Marley.
Lastly, on Friday, May 7, Barstoolpalooza is coming to UNH, featuring Sam Adams in the Granite State Room thanks to Alpha Sigma Phi. Even though I am not a fan of Sam Adams and I am much more excited for MGMT, I think that it is awesome that a non-entertainment organization stepped up to the plate when others couldn’t pull the trigger. I hope this will lead to more organizations putting on small concerts with semi-local and semi-well known acts. Hopefully this could lead to more up-and-coming acts here at UNH.
Stay classy, not UMassy.
To me, summer vacation means that I’ll be waking up three hours earlier every day and working outside in hot and humid weather. Don’t get me wrong, I love that I get to work outside, but I rather enjoy being at UNH. If you ask me, I am already on vacation because I get to sleep in every day of the week and hangout and relax almost every night. Sure, I go to classes during the day and I have a lot of homework, but with proper time-management college is actually not too bad. Although I am writing this at midnight on a Sunday because I watched cartoons all day, that is not the point. Because I forgot what the point of this column was halfway through that paragraph. Is it possible to catch ADD this late in life?
Let me try and get back on track. You know that old saying, “There is a time and a place for that and it is called college”? Well, we are in college, so that time and place is right now. Have fun. Enjoy yourselves now because before you know it, you’ll be in the real world with infinitely more responsibilities.
Speaking of having fun, what could be more fun than eating a burrito at two in the morning? Well you are in luck because Irie Taco has started its late-night hours. I’m taking credit for it because I recommended this to the owner the first time I went and he said he would think about it. You welcome, UNH. Their chicken burrito could very well rival Kurt’s cheesy fries and D-Hop slices as my top choice for third-dinner. Irie Taco is located at the loop next to the Mills and behind Huddleston Hall.
Speaking of the name Huddleston, thanks to Twitter I have a whole new appreciation for our university’s president. I call them Huddletweets. His tweets really show how much time goes into running UNH from attending meetings to giving lectures to mid-morning runs to IHOP. So really, apart from attending lectures and meetings, we aren’t so different.<
I would also like to take this opportunity to make a few quick announcements. On Tuesday and Thursday of this week there will be a table in the MUB from 12:40 to 2:00 p.m. looking for student signatures in support of a Good Samaritan policy at UNH. This is something that really could make a difference on campus in regards to the safety of students so please take a moment this week to sign the petition.
While on the topic of politics, the past few years there has been a terribly low voter turnout for student senate elections. These are the students who help make changes for the better of the student body. So if you’re like me and you really support a cause on campus, such as a Good Samaritan or medical amnesty policy, this year’s voting may be more important then ever before. So make sure you remember to vote on April 20. Wait, what? Yes, that’s right, this year’s student senate elections are on 4/20. To the people who don’t see the problem with that date, thank you in advance for remembering to vote. Although, this could be a giant conspiracy: I mean if only 5 percent of campus votes, will the winners actually get elected? We need to find out who decided on this date and check to see if they are on the ballot. Something smells funny here and it isn’t the room down the hall blasting Bob Marley.
Lastly, on Friday, May 7, Barstoolpalooza is coming to UNH, featuring Sam Adams in the Granite State Room thanks to Alpha Sigma Phi. Even though I am not a fan of Sam Adams and I am much more excited for MGMT, I think that it is awesome that a non-entertainment organization stepped up to the plate when others couldn’t pull the trigger. I hope this will lead to more organizations putting on small concerts with semi-local and semi-well known acts. Hopefully this could lead to more up-and-coming acts here at UNH.
Stay classy, not UMassy.
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Monday, March 29, 2010
20 Years of Coach Umile
For 20 years Dick Umile has been the men’s hockey coach here at UNH. After another embarrassing playoff exit, this time in the Hockey East quarterfinals and the second round of the NCAAs, the question comes up if Umile has overstayed his visit. Perhaps the biggest question in regards to Umile is his motivational ability. The game against RIT was the perfect example of a talented UNH offense coming out flat in a big game. RIT won every loose puck, they clogged up the middle of the ice and UNH played sloppy. Where was the team that scored 6 goals on Cornell, the nations best defense, the night before?
In 2008 Umile signed a long term contracts. A few years ago, after a terrible loss to Notre Dame in the NCAA tournament, UNH gave Umile a huge pay raise (in 2008 he made $382,299.85. That is about $80,000 more than President Huddleston and $200,000 more than football coach Sean McDonnell. Full list of University system of NH salaries here.) Umile is the highest paid state employee. This means that Umile isn’t going to be fired anytime soon, but maybe it is time for him to be the bigger man and step down. UNH is hurting for a National Title and after 20 years it has become apparent that Umile isn’t the man for the job.
Since Umile was hired UNH has only had one loosing season (1995-96) and they have won the Hockey East regular season title eight times. That is pretty unbelievable, but when push comes to shove, Umile’s teams have drastically underperformed in the playoffs, both in Hockey East and on the National stage.
In those 20 years UNH has only won two Hockey East Tournaments, despite being the number one seed eight times. In those 20 years UNH has made it to the National Championship game twice. In the 1998-99 championship they lost to Maine in overtime, a team they beat three times that season. That UNH team had several All-Americans, including Hobey Baker winner Jason Krog as well as Darren Haydar and goalie Ty Conklin. In 2002-03 they lost 5-1 to Minnesota in another dismal performance. Since then the team has failed to make the frozen four despite making the tournament all seven years. The past two seasons they have won in the first round despite being the underdog.
Perhaps Umile’s best accomplishment has been leading his team to the NCAA tournament 16 of his 20 years at UNH. Whether you hate him or love him that is an amazing statistic. But in those 16 years they have only made it to the frozen four, four times. That means 12 times the team lost their first or second round game.
Let’s face it UNH has had some pretty great and highly talented teams, but truly great teams don’t choke in the playoffs. A family friend, who has been a huge Maine supporter for around 40 years, just told me that UNH and Umile regularly have the more talent, but he can’t do anything with it. Hockey East is arguable the toughest conference in Division I hockey. The past two National Titles have gone to BC and BU, with BC recently playing in the championship three years in a row. Maine has twice won the National Championship while UNH, considered to be apart of the Hockey East “big four” has never won a national title. Under Umile UNH has regularly peaked mid season before suffering a late year collapse.
I know what Umile supporters would be arguing right now: He has brought UNH to glory, made them a national powerhouse and brought “Pride, Tradition and Excellence” to Durham. What pride? Sure they lead hockey east in regular season attendance, but in the first round of the Hockey East this year the highest attended game was only about 4,000 almost 2,000 less than the season average. What tradition? Peaking in mid-season and loosing in the playoffs? What excellence? Regular season titles mean nothing compared to the playoffs. Also, I don’t think a team can truly be considered a national powerhouse without ever winning a national title.
Other great college sports teams have been faced with similar problems. Just a few years ago Michigan Football pressured their coach into retirement and the past two seasons have been rebuilding years for the Wolverines. If UNH were to seek out a new coach, we may have to go through with an ugly season or two, but sometimes change is needed. And if that leads to a national title in a few years it would definitely be worth it. Other teams, such as Florida football in 2005 and the Red Sox in 2004 have won championships with a first year head coach.
Just a few years ago UNH football was a complete joke. After hiring coach Sean McDonnell they have turned it around and become more of a national contender than the hockey team. That took about 5 years, not 20. This year the men’s basketball team (who was 7th in their conference) came closer to the a conference championship then the hockey team.
I don’t want to give off the wrong impression. I love UNH hockey. Growing up in seacoast New Hampshire I have attended well over 40 games in my life. As a child I dreamed of the day I could stand in the student section and be proud to call myself a Wildcat. During my time at UNH I have only missed a handful of home games and when I do it is because I am off campus.
I am tired of answering “1985 Women’s Lacrosse” to the “University of No Hardware” crowd. Umile has done great things at UNH, and I believe it is time for the university to really think about their athletic goals. If those goals are to sell-out games and field a competitive hockey team every year than Umile is a great choice. But if those goals are to win a National Championship it may be time to move in another direction.
Stay Classy, not UMassy.
Labels:
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Saturday, March 27, 2010
The Final Countdown
At 6:30 tonight the UNH men's hockey team takes on Rochester Institute of Technology with the victor heading to the Frozen Four in Detroit. RIT upset Denver last night and UNH upset Cornell to advance to this Elite Eight matchup. Hobey Baker hopeful Bobby Butler scored two goals, one was an absolute snipe and the other a great break-away, and he also added an assist. Butler has carried UNH when they need him most and his 29 goals this season is the most in the country. Paul "I score chicks and goals" Thompson and Mike Sislo also had two goals each as Brian Foster played a solid game in net. Although RIT is a four seed and in their first NCAA Division 1 tournament ever they are a very solid team, especially on the defensive end. Be sure to watch the game (6:30 ESPNU) and we will celebrate in the streets tonight.
WMUR will have a camera crew on campus so be ready for anything. Seriously, when you're a top blogger like me there are some pretty powerful connections to be made. I actually got a call from a producer asking where I was watching the game. That being said, does anyone know if there will be a mass gathering to watch the game other than the bars? I know they played the Super Bowl in the MUB.
So be ready for a great game tonight and I'll see you all in the streets!
PS: If you want Valhalla to open for Sam Adams join this group.
Stay classy, not UMassy.
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Friday, March 26, 2010
Alcohol and Hockey
I woke up this morning at 8:30 and I had something known as a hangover. Actually, let me rephrase that, I didn't have a hangover. I woke up and I was still drunk. Last night and early into this morning I had quite a few rum and cokes, several more than I had planned. I was in no shape to attend my 10 a.m. class but I had a quiz that I couldn't miss so I made the trek across campus and aced my quiz. I'm ready to do it again this weekend.
So the moral of this story is that Sailor Jerry's Spiced Rum gets the job done.
Also, the UNH men's hockey team has their opening round game tonight against Cornell at 6:30 on ESPNU, channel 54 on campus. I expect everyone on campus to be watching that game and getting hammered. Last year's opening round game was unbelievable and I am interested to see how the team reacts after falling to Vermont in the Hockey East tournament.
I will never get tired of watching this:
Have a good weekend UNH. Party hard, stay smart, stay safe and most importantly:
Stay classy, not UMassy.
So the moral of this story is that Sailor Jerry's Spiced Rum gets the job done.
Also, the UNH men's hockey team has their opening round game tonight against Cornell at 6:30 on ESPNU, channel 54 on campus. I expect everyone on campus to be watching that game and getting hammered. Last year's opening round game was unbelievable and I am interested to see how the team reacts after falling to Vermont in the Hockey East tournament.
I will never get tired of watching this:
Have a good weekend UNH. Party hard, stay smart, stay safe and most importantly:
Stay classy, not UMassy.
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Let's Do This
Alright listen up UNH, I currently have two goals.
1) To have as much fun as possible during these last weekends before summer. To get you pumped up here is an epic collection of Beirut dunks.
Please, if you have the technology and the ups send me your own video submissions. I would love that so much. If you do you will be crowned blog reader of the year and possibly win a prize. (Maybe). It is currently a tight race and this could be a chance for a true dark horse to come up big. Just make sure that I can tell it is at UNH, meaning a shirt, logo or any UNH identifiable image. Or you can just say it on camera. I will try my best to try and capture a few by years end, maybe even my own, but no promises.
My second goal is to get UNH's own Valhalla to open for Sam Adams. I have no idea if Adams, or Barstoolpalooza has their own opener, but we're going to try. I have never met Valhalla, but he is the man behind "Drop 'em" and "Party at UNH" which can be heard at almost every campus party or dorm room. So I am asking my readers to go on the event page for the Sam Adams show and request Valhalla to open, I know several already have. You even email "El Prez" from Barstool and request it if you want. UNH students came up big to get Adams in the first place, so why can't we get our own local opener?
UNHers I am counting on you to help make this happen. So remember:
1) get drunk.
2) get a camera and a crappy Beirut table.
3) film your best (or worst) dunk attempt.
4) email me a link or video to win best blog reader of the year.
5) request Valhalla to open.
Stay classy, not UMassy.
1) To have as much fun as possible during these last weekends before summer. To get you pumped up here is an epic collection of Beirut dunks.
Please, if you have the technology and the ups send me your own video submissions. I would love that so much. If you do you will be crowned blog reader of the year and possibly win a prize. (Maybe). It is currently a tight race and this could be a chance for a true dark horse to come up big. Just make sure that I can tell it is at UNH, meaning a shirt, logo or any UNH identifiable image. Or you can just say it on camera. I will try my best to try and capture a few by years end, maybe even my own, but no promises.
My second goal is to get UNH's own Valhalla to open for Sam Adams. I have no idea if Adams, or Barstoolpalooza has their own opener, but we're going to try. I have never met Valhalla, but he is the man behind "Drop 'em" and "Party at UNH" which can be heard at almost every campus party or dorm room. So I am asking my readers to go on the event page for the Sam Adams show and request Valhalla to open, I know several already have. You even email "El Prez" from Barstool and request it if you want. UNH students came up big to get Adams in the first place, so why can't we get our own local opener?
UNHers I am counting on you to help make this happen. So remember:
1) get drunk.
2) get a camera and a crappy Beirut table.
3) film your best (or worst) dunk attempt.
4) email me a link or video to win best blog reader of the year.
5) request Valhalla to open.
Stay classy, not UMassy.
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Students push hard to get Sam Adams
A few weeks back the infamous "El Presidente" of Barstool sports announced that Barstool would be presenting a local college tour for rapper Sam Adams. UNH was one of their top choices, as it should be. Even though I am not a big fan of Sam Adams I know a lot of fellow students have jumped on his bandwagon and he very well could be the next big rapper, so I immediately sent the link to SCOPE. According to rumors SCOPE originally turned down the request, even though there wasn't going to be a base charge for Adams. The promoters just wanted $20 a ticket. SCOPE didn't think that students would be willing to pay $20, but in just one day over 1,200 students joined the "Bring Sam Adams to UNH" facebook group. This show would also help please those students upset about the MGMT concert.
According to a post today on barstool "UNH is getting close thanks to all the Wildcats who came out of the woodwork demanding that we bring Sam Adams to Durham and doing what the school organizations wouldn’t do." So basically students are stepping up and doing SCOPE's job for them. To make it worse, students at Maine are calling us out for SCOPE dropping the ball. (Maine also had the Roots last week so it isn't like this would be their big concert either.) From what I have been able to gather is sounds like a few greek organizations are actually spearheading the Sam Adams at UNH show, so that could be pretty sweet. I honestly think that this show would be perfect for the Granite State Room, which can hold around 800. I know that is small, but Adams usually only performs for a few hundred and the Whit and the Field House might not be available. Also, the GSR has better sound than the other options.
I am boggled that the entertainment committees didn't show more effort in this event. If there isn't a base charge for the performer that should be a good thing, who cares if student and non-student tickets are the same price? Bottom line, even though I don't care too much for Adams, this would be a great college show and it just proves how ignorant SCOPE can be. I would actually like to see more small concerts like this in the GSR, that way UNH would get more variety in their shows. If Adams doesn't come to UNH it would be all SCOPE's fault, and there is absolutely no denying that.
Stay classy, not UMassy.
EDIT: 3:12 pm: Sam Adams responded to a tweet I sent him saying "ill make it out there for sure" in reference to a UNH show.
EDIT: 6:12 pm: It is official, Ryan O'Connor a brother of Alpha Sigma Phi got the GSR for a Sam Adams show. Nice job Ryan, I guess things can get done with little notice, and he's not even in a student entertainment organization. The show is on May 7th.
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Historical figures to drink with
So the other day I was sitting in my history class taking notes. I was in the mode where you just write down everything on the powerpoint slide, but you're not paying attention. I began thinking about different people throughout history who would be fun to get drunk with. Like really drunk and just shoot the shit.
As a history major, and an admirer of beer, I think I am qualified to discuss which historical figures would be fun to drink with. I know this has been done before, but these are my personal opinions.
Think of how fun it would have been to get shit faced with Thomas Jefferson and get him really fired up about starting some revolution and then afterwards he would probably smoke you up with George Washington with some high quality "Indian hemp" as they called it. Or how about Ben Franklin, he loved a good beer... and French whores. Ben Franklin would probably get real belligerent, I mean he (or someone working for him...) tied a key to a kite in a lightening storm, he had to have thought of that when he was drunk. Franklin also said "beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." Him and Thomas Paine probably got kicked out of more bars than you could imagine. Abe Lincoln would make another good drinking partner and Teddy Roosevelt probably had a bunch of great stories from his time as the New York City police commissioner in the 1890's. Winston Churchill would definitely be a top 5 pick for me after I discovered his response to "Sir, you're drunk!" was "Madam, you're ugly; But at least I'll be sober in the morning." Good times would be had by all.
But there are other people who I would have liked to get drunk and then watch them get their ass kicked. Hitler is the obvious choice. I would have loved to see Hitler get his ass kicked. And then I would push him off a bridge. Or Joe McCarthy. I would point out some big dudes at the bar and tell him there were communists who hated America. He would try and start shit and get his ass kicked all the way back to Wisconsin. (I'm assuming we wouldn't be drinking in Wisconsin.) Don't get me wrong I hate communism, but McCarthy was a lying douchebag who deserved a good ass-kicking.
As for people who are still living, George W. Bush would be fun too, except he would probably try and start a fight with the table across the room just because he thought they might try and fight us. That could lead to a real messy situation. Bill Clinton would probably be real fun, but he seems like he would be the type of guy would leave with the first chick who flirted with him. Bro's before hoes, Billy! I bet Hillary would show up right when he was about to leave and kick the shit out of him. I can't leave out Obama, he seems like he knows how to have a fun time, especially with Biden around.
Other people (dead or alive) I would like to have a beer or two or 10 with include: Stephan Colbert, Zach Galifianakis, Hunter S Thompson, Johnny Cash, Eugene Hutz, Warren Zevon (pretty much any classic rocker for that matter), and Megan Fox. (That should go without saying...)
Who would you like to get drunk with?
Stay classy, not UMassy.
Monday, March 22, 2010
Drinking Games
Rusty's post from Saturday got me really excited for the final countdown of weekends at UNH before summer break. It has inspired me to share some of my all-time favorite drinking games. For the most part these are all pretty well known games, but true classics are classics for a reason. Because they're awesome and they make getting drunk even more awesome and fun. By the way, I am listening to MGMT's new album on NPR as I write this, so if you're a fan of the band I recommend you check out that last link. So, in no specific order, just the order I think of them, I give you The New Hampshirite's personal favorite drinking games:
Also it has been brought to my attention that there is a new UNH blog in town... or online... called unschool UNH. It appears to be a liberal activist/sustainable-community-oriented sort of blog and since they link to me I have decided to return the favor.
- Beirut- That's right. It is a classic, simple and results in a great level of drunkitude. Shoot the ping pong ball into the bowling pin-arranged cups and watch your opponent get sloshed. Just be warned, they call me Ray Allen for a reason. Clutch.
- Beer Pong- often confused with Beirut, beer pong is actually a game played with paddles on a real ping-pong table. In beer pong there is a cup of beer at each of the 4 corners of the table, every point you opponent gets you take a sip and if the ball lands in a cup you must finish it. This game can be seen in Beerfest.
- Kings- A great card game where the cards are arranged face-down in a circle around a center cup. Each player pulls a card and must do what ever rule is assigned to that card. There are many different rules and ways to play so I won't go into detail for each card. The cup in the middle can be an empty solo cup that is filled with a combination of each players drink and is drank by the person who pulls the 4th king. The center cup can also be a beer can and each card pulled is put under the tab. Whose ever card opens the beer must drink it.
- Apples to Apples- Not necessarily a drinking game but it can easily be turned into one. This is a lot of fun and easy and it doesn't get too difficult as your level of intoxication increases. It does require specific playing cards so that is one downfall of the game.
- Dringa- Take each block from a Jenga set and write a rule on it, many rules can be similar to kings or even more bizarre. My personal favorites include acting out a movie scene or singing a verse from a '90's one hit wonder. Whoever knocks over the tower must finish his or her drink and rebuild it. Difficulty greatly increases after a few drinks.
- Drink the Beer- Drink the beer and you win another beer!
- Movie drinking- pick a favorite movie and enforce a sip whenever certain words are said. Real troopers like "fuck" in The Departed or "man/dude" from The Big Lebowski. (And smoke a J every time the Dude does.)
- Fuck the dealer- This is a game where you guess the next card in the deck. As the game goes on, the dealer gets fucked. High levels of intoxication are reached. Very similar to another favorite, Up the River (some call it down the river).
- Darts- playing darts is awesome, drink casually or make up your own rules.
- Polish horseshoes- An outdoor game where a beer bottle is placed on top of a ski pole (or stick) in the ground. There are two sides, each with a pole/bottle, and the teams take turns trying to knock the bottle off with a frisbee.
- Horseballs- also called ladderball, is another outdoor game. Kind of hard to explain, but easy to play. (PS I don't recommend looking up videos of "horseballs.")
- Other simple/common games: quarters, spoons, asshole, baseball...
I know there are a bunch more that I like, but I can't think of them all/I need to go to class, so comment below some of your favorite games. (Hmm, kind of ironic I can't remember some drinking games, huh?)
Also it has been brought to my attention that there is a new UNH blog in town... or online... called unschool UNH. It appears to be a liberal activist/sustainable-community-oriented sort of blog and since they link to me I have decided to return the favor.
Stay classy, not UMassy.
Sunday, March 21, 2010
Back from break
Now that spring break is over things will be picking back up in Durham, and on this blog. I decided to take a break from blogging, although Rusty wrote a terrific piece yesterday about taking advantage of nice weather and doing some outdoor partying. My spring break consisted of college basketball (Really, Kansas? Go underdogs!), riding my bike to the beach, and cursing out Dick Umile. Although it was announced that UNH will be the three seed in the Albany bracket for the NCAA men's hockey tournament. Last year UNH was a three seed when they pulled off a great comeback against North Dakota before taking the eventual champion Boston University down to the final minute.
Well UNHers, that is all I have for now, but the blog's one year anniversary is next week so I have some plans for that. We are down to our final two months before summer so take advantage of your freedom now and have fun. Party on and party hard!
Stay classy, not UMassy.
Well UNHers, that is all I have for now, but the blog's one year anniversary is next week so I have some plans for that. We are down to our final two months before summer so take advantage of your freedom now and have fun. Party on and party hard!
Stay classy, not UMassy.
Saturday, March 20, 2010
The Last Hurrah
Spring break is basically done, and some of us might be pissed that it falls on the week of St. Patrick's Day (I am), and also the first week of the Hockey East Tournament.. Oh wait! Luckily, UNH hockey saved us the trouble of missing the Wildcats play for some kind of hardware by shitting the bed in the first round against Vermont at home! Awesome! Thanks again!
Spring break is great because it can be used for a week of relaxing at home, watching the snow dwindle away and catching some college basketball, or going on a trip somewhere warm around or outside of the country. It's a very versatile week of not having to do anything. Most of the time, there's one thing missing from most spring breaks: partying with your friends from college. That's because all of them are on spring break too probably not doing what you're doing, but I really don't have a better way to introduce this point across, so bear with me.
Let me put on some music first before I get this thing rolling.
There's about two months left of being at UNH for the majority of campus. That's about eight or nine more weekends of partying. I'm not doing any more math, but that's not a lot of time left. This is the end of the year. Why do you think SCOPE calls their concert the Spring Climax? It's so the last months before summer can jizz booze and bad decisions all over the campus for the residents of Durham to clean off before the cycle begins all over again. At least, that's my understanding of it.
If this is your freshman year, make the rest of your time here count. If you're a senior, make the rest of your time here count, because DAMN LIFE IS GOING TO SUCK AFTER THIS. Have you been reading any of the news? Most college students don't really listen to it since they're in a protective bubble on campus where the only problems are when you're going to get beer and how you're going to get into that frat. Also, you think it's acceptable to drink on Thursdays in the real world? Do it a couple times and your friends will hold an intervention for your alcoholism.
With the warm months comes the magical hobby of drinking outside while it's sunny. There are few feelings that beat the experience of sitting on a lawn at Young Drive or anywhere else holding a beer/Solo cup/whatever you're drinking while it's one in the afternoon. Outside beer pong? Much more interesting with the wind as a factor. And probably one of the best things about the warm months of college? Skirt day, when all the girls decide to ditch sweatpants and actually gussy themselves up and wear something that leaves less to the imagination. THIS IS YOUR TIME. MAKE IT COUNT.
You might ask why the fuck I'm repeating the same thing over and over again. I want to get it through your heads. Colleges in Florida, California, and places like that? It's warm over there for so much longer than it is up here. They're spoiled with great months like this. Skirt day is every day. They can drink outside as frequently as they want. Since we're in New Hampshire, the time with warm weather that we have is much shorter than them. Sure, global warming might equalize things in a couple decades but you won't be in college then.
When we get back, I want porch drinking. I want day-long parties. I want Polish horseshoes. No, that's not a sex act. Look it up.
We've only got a handful of weekends left to make Durham residents consider selling their house and moving somewhere less rowdy. MAKE IT COUNT.
Spring break is great because it can be used for a week of relaxing at home, watching the snow dwindle away and catching some college basketball, or going on a trip somewhere warm around or outside of the country. It's a very versatile week of not having to do anything. Most of the time, there's one thing missing from most spring breaks: partying with your friends from college. That's because all of them are on spring break too probably not doing what you're doing, but I really don't have a better way to introduce this point across, so bear with me.
Let me put on some music first before I get this thing rolling.
There's about two months left of being at UNH for the majority of campus. That's about eight or nine more weekends of partying. I'm not doing any more math, but that's not a lot of time left. This is the end of the year. Why do you think SCOPE calls their concert the Spring Climax? It's so the last months before summer can jizz booze and bad decisions all over the campus for the residents of Durham to clean off before the cycle begins all over again. At least, that's my understanding of it.
If this is your freshman year, make the rest of your time here count. If you're a senior, make the rest of your time here count, because DAMN LIFE IS GOING TO SUCK AFTER THIS. Have you been reading any of the news? Most college students don't really listen to it since they're in a protective bubble on campus where the only problems are when you're going to get beer and how you're going to get into that frat. Also, you think it's acceptable to drink on Thursdays in the real world? Do it a couple times and your friends will hold an intervention for your alcoholism.
With the warm months comes the magical hobby of drinking outside while it's sunny. There are few feelings that beat the experience of sitting on a lawn at Young Drive or anywhere else holding a beer/Solo cup/whatever you're drinking while it's one in the afternoon. Outside beer pong? Much more interesting with the wind as a factor. And probably one of the best things about the warm months of college? Skirt day, when all the girls decide to ditch sweatpants and actually gussy themselves up and wear something that leaves less to the imagination. THIS IS YOUR TIME. MAKE IT COUNT.
You might ask why the fuck I'm repeating the same thing over and over again. I want to get it through your heads. Colleges in Florida, California, and places like that? It's warm over there for so much longer than it is up here. They're spoiled with great months like this. Skirt day is every day. They can drink outside as frequently as they want. Since we're in New Hampshire, the time with warm weather that we have is much shorter than them. Sure, global warming might equalize things in a couple decades but you won't be in college then.
When we get back, I want porch drinking. I want day-long parties. I want Polish horseshoes. No, that's not a sex act. Look it up.
We've only got a handful of weekends left to make Durham residents consider selling their house and moving somewhere less rowdy. MAKE IT COUNT.
Labels:
MAKE IT COUNT,
spring break,
summer,
UNH
Friday, March 12, 2010
Spring Break
I don't think I have ever been so happy for a vacation from school more than today. I love everything about UNH, but these past few weeks have been exhausting, so I plan on doing absolutely nothing over next week. It will be awesome. I hope you all have a wonderful break and be ready for the semester to pick up again. The are two problems I have with UNH's break though. The first is that we will be home for St. Patrick's day, which takes away from some shenanigans, don't worry there will be shenanigans, just not top notch shenanigans. The second problem is that once again my birthday falls over break so I am yet to have a birthday at UNH. It is like the administration somehow knows that if we were in school for the New Hampshirite's birthday shit would go down. Speaking of birthdays the blog will turn one year old just over a week after break so I have a few plans for that. That is all I really have and I probably won't post much, if at all, over break; but be prepared for the second half of the semester. Have a nice break and enjoy your time off. Shenanigans.
Stay classy, not UMassy.
Labels:
blog,
spring break,
UNH,
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Thursday, March 11, 2010
Happy Spring Cleaning!
This is coming kind of late in the day, but today is spring cleaning after all. What's spring cleaning at UNH you ask? It is the last Thirsty Thursday before spring break, which means for all of us still living in dorms it is time to clean out all of our alcohol and any other substances that you don't want to take home or leave at school. It really is a great day, and one of my personal favorite holidays. This will be my last spring cleaning since I'm moving into the Gables next year so I am going to keep this quick and make sure the night is memorable. This has been one crazy week from essays, to projects to exams to waiting in line for 4 hours so I think we all deserve to kick back and cut loose tonight. Have fun UNH, and enjoy every sandwich.
Stay classy, not UMassy.
Stay classy, not UMassy.
Labels:
alcohol,
party,
thirsty thursday,
UNH
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Thoughts on Spring Climax
Let me start this off by saying I was very happy to see SCOPE book MGMT for a show. I think this will be a great concert and many students were obviously pleased seeing how quickly it sold out. I was in line at 8:30 a.m. and finally was able to buy a ticket just after 12:30. During those four hours I missed two classes because I determined that MGMT > latin and anthropology. Also, some friends had required classes or tests that they couldn't miss. I was in line to buy three tickets, one for me, one for my roommate and one for a friend who doesn't go to UNH. Needless to say the 200 non-student tickets went fast so I bought a third student ticket for a kid who couldn't wait longer (and I made $5 for it.) Anyways, a lot of people were very upset to learn the show sold out before they could get tickets, especially those who waited in line all morning. Take a peek at this email one blog reader sent in:
"It's disappointing that Scope booked an artist that isn't going to play in the Whit to allow the most amount of the student population to see the show. I skipped a mandatory class and I know my friends and other people skipped their classes and missed tests to wait in line. Some were lucky to get a ticket but most of them, like me, just waited and wasted their time to find out that the show was sold out. Why would Scope pick a band that didn't want to play for a large group of kids? It doesn't make sense when there are 12,000+ undergrads at UNH. I like the that Scope mixed it up and chose MGMT and was really looking forward to the show but they should've picked a band that was willing to play for a larger audience since there's such a large group of people here or at least work things out with MGMT to get them to play at the Whit. Someone said Akon had about 5,000-6,000 kids but the Spring CLIMAX is only going to have 2,400?! I feel bad for the Seniors this year that wanted but didn't get a ticket, this is their last Climax and they won't be a part of it. Students should at least get some of their $93 student activity fee back if Scope isn't going to give them an opportunity to purchase a ticket that they already basically half paid for. I know you are excited to see MGMT lets see you use some of your pull and try to get more of the UNH students the ability to enjoy the show by trying to get the show moved to the Whit. I read your blog everyday and if you can get UNH dining shaking in their boots you're my hope to try and reach out to Scope. I really want to see this show. Thanks."
First of all, that was an awesome email to read, so thank you. I do own dining, but they are run by immature and self-conscience adults who are much easier to piss of than students who get bitched at 4 times a year for not booking everybody's favorite band. I said before that I wouldn't bash on SCOPE because I think they did a great job landing MGMT, but I completely understand where this reader is coming from. So, as much as it pains me, I am not going to take a side for once. I think that SCOPE needs to respect MGMT's request for the smaller venue, but don't forget last year's climax with Lupe was also scheduled for the field house and later moved into the Whit. Personally, I have always felt that the field house actually has better sound quality than the Whit. With such a high ceiling and open concourse the sound can become lost and distorted in the Whit. On the other side of the spectrum I feel terrible for people who had to wait in line without getting a ticket in the end. I would have been absolute rip-shit if that happened to me... and you would never here the end of it.
However, I feel there were two main problems that go beyond who is playing and where. The first is that non-student tickets should not be sold until the day after student tickets go on sale. And they should be treated as regular tickets if the student tickets sellout. 200 activity-fee-paying-UNH students cannot attend this concert because non-student tickets went on sale at the same time. I think that is the most unfair situation of all. The second problem was SCOPE members being terrible at organization. When I entered the GSR at 8:30 this morning I was asked if I was paying cash or credit. I said cash and was directed to one line. After about an hour I saw a sign that said "cash and student tickets only," and I was planning on buying one non-student ticket. (So I would have been a part of the first problem, back off.) So I needed to switch lines and in another hour we were told non-student tickets were sold out. I then switched back into the cash line and eventually (2 hours later) got my tickets. I don't understand why in the beginning that the SCOPE member didn't tell me that it was cash and students only. Luckily I realized this before it was too late, or I might have been out a ticket too.
At least SCOPE doesn't charge ridiculous fees like ticket master. Check out this screen shot I took after purchasing a ticket to see Gogol Bordello in Boston:
"It's disappointing that Scope booked an artist that isn't going to play in the Whit to allow the most amount of the student population to see the show. I skipped a mandatory class and I know my friends and other people skipped their classes and missed tests to wait in line. Some were lucky to get a ticket but most of them, like me, just waited and wasted their time to find out that the show was sold out. Why would Scope pick a band that didn't want to play for a large group of kids? It doesn't make sense when there are 12,000+ undergrads at UNH. I like the that Scope mixed it up and chose MGMT and was really looking forward to the show but they should've picked a band that was willing to play for a larger audience since there's such a large group of people here or at least work things out with MGMT to get them to play at the Whit. Someone said Akon had about 5,000-6,000 kids but the Spring CLIMAX is only going to have 2,400?! I feel bad for the Seniors this year that wanted but didn't get a ticket, this is their last Climax and they won't be a part of it. Students should at least get some of their $93 student activity fee back if Scope isn't going to give them an opportunity to purchase a ticket that they already basically half paid for. I know you are excited to see MGMT lets see you use some of your pull and try to get more of the UNH students the ability to enjoy the show by trying to get the show moved to the Whit. I read your blog everyday and if you can get UNH dining shaking in their boots you're my hope to try and reach out to Scope. I really want to see this show. Thanks."
First of all, that was an awesome email to read, so thank you. I do own dining, but they are run by immature and self-conscience adults who are much easier to piss of than students who get bitched at 4 times a year for not booking everybody's favorite band. I said before that I wouldn't bash on SCOPE because I think they did a great job landing MGMT, but I completely understand where this reader is coming from. So, as much as it pains me, I am not going to take a side for once. I think that SCOPE needs to respect MGMT's request for the smaller venue, but don't forget last year's climax with Lupe was also scheduled for the field house and later moved into the Whit. Personally, I have always felt that the field house actually has better sound quality than the Whit. With such a high ceiling and open concourse the sound can become lost and distorted in the Whit. On the other side of the spectrum I feel terrible for people who had to wait in line without getting a ticket in the end. I would have been absolute rip-shit if that happened to me... and you would never here the end of it.
However, I feel there were two main problems that go beyond who is playing and where. The first is that non-student tickets should not be sold until the day after student tickets go on sale. And they should be treated as regular tickets if the student tickets sellout. 200 activity-fee-paying-UNH students cannot attend this concert because non-student tickets went on sale at the same time. I think that is the most unfair situation of all. The second problem was SCOPE members being terrible at organization. When I entered the GSR at 8:30 this morning I was asked if I was paying cash or credit. I said cash and was directed to one line. After about an hour I saw a sign that said "cash and student tickets only," and I was planning on buying one non-student ticket. (So I would have been a part of the first problem, back off.) So I needed to switch lines and in another hour we were told non-student tickets were sold out. I then switched back into the cash line and eventually (2 hours later) got my tickets. I don't understand why in the beginning that the SCOPE member didn't tell me that it was cash and students only. Luckily I realized this before it was too late, or I might have been out a ticket too.
At least SCOPE doesn't charge ridiculous fees like ticket master. Check out this screen shot I took after purchasing a ticket to see Gogol Bordello in Boston:
Really? $8.05 convenience charge? $2.95 to oder online and $2.50 to print a ticket. Bullshit!
I had to pay $40.50 for a $27 ticket! Whatever, I guess between that and waiting in line for 4 hours today will be worth it to see two sick concerts two nights apart. Before I leave I really would like to see SCOPE contact MGMT and inquire about a larger show at the Whit. How nice would it be to see MGMT outdoors at night? Or how about they say fuck fire code and sell more tickets for the field house! That thing ain't burning down!
Stay classy, not UMassy.
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
UNH Loraxing it up
A reader email from last night tipped me off about something on campus that I found quite amusing. As we all know the wind storm caused some major damage around campus. The majority of this damage was from trees that had fallen or snapped in half. Out in front of Thompson Hall there used to be two pine trees, one of either side of the patio with the flagpole, as seen below. Well, during the storm one of the trees snapped in half towards the top. If you saw it, it was pretty goofy looking.
Old picture, notice the two smaller pine trees to the sides of the stairs in front of the flagpole.
From this morning, no more pine trees.
If you're gonna cut them down, at least pull the stumps.
As you can see both of the pine trees are now gone. This is because the grounds crew cut down both trees to keep the symmetry. Now, I am not a super green-environmentalist-advocate, nor do I drive a Hummer, but I think it is kind of funny that the other healthy tree was cut down too. Didn't the grounds crew read (or watch) the Lorax as a child? We need the trees! You see, my friends, trees are the answer.
Stay classy, not UMassy.
Labels:
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thompson hall,
trees,
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The UNH Bucketlist
Fellow TNH columnist Corey Nachman and I teamed up for one super column this week. I hope you enjoy our collaboration.
Unless you’re either obsessed with emulating Van Wilder and have the funds to do so, your college experience is going to end after a fairly short amount of time. It should be in our minds at all times that we should be constantly participating in activities that will most assuredly be memorable so we can remember this place as fondly as possible. This isn’t a typical bucket list. The following is a compilation of unique things every student should consider trying before graduating UNH to make your experience that much more memorable.
Camp Out in the Little Red Wagon: It doesn’t serve much of a purpose so why not spend a night camping out in it? A lot of people would think that College Woods would be the premier campout spot on campus, but think of the reactions you would get from people who spot your spending the night in the wagon.
Speaking of College Woods, a massive game of hide and seek in there is another item on the list. Just be careful not to get lost or you might end up unintentionally achieving another item; sit in College Woods until you have an epiphany. Who knows, maybe you will decide to change your major or add a minor. Just don’t eat any suspicious-looking berries.
Attempt different food challenges: Eating a Manley at Kurt’s is a good place to start and while you’re there, you should try to work with Kurt for a night. You are bound to hear some wild stories and see drunken students make fools of themselves. Then, of course, there is JP’s Slap Shot: 15 sliders, a large fry and a large shake. Finish it in 30 minutes and you will find yourself on the Wall of Fame… and about 15 pounds heavier. Next up we have D-Hop. Every student at UNH must complete the Grand Slam – attending D-Hop twice in one night on consecutive nights. You should throw in a trip to Wildcat Pizza too; a lot of people claim they have the better pizza even though D-Hop receives all the attention.
Bring and throw your own fish at a hockey game: After the first UNH goal is scored a fan throws a fish on the ice, but any true fan would bring a fish of their own. This should be applied to more campus activities, such as throwing a fish after the first UNH touchdown at a football game. Ace an exam? Throw a fish. Amaze people with your dancing skills at a party? Throw a fish. Show up to HoCo, throw a fish down on the stir-fry at and then demand them to cook it.
Complain about the lack of snow days: After the first snow dusting of the year join the Facebook group “UNH would rather see the streets of Durham littered with bodies of students than cancel classes.” Once the snow does accumulate, take a snow day (skipping classes will probably be necessary) to sled at both Wagon Hill in Dover and Library Hill on campus.
Get your party on: UNH has always been considered to be a “party school” so it doesn’t take long to realize that the Thirsty Thursday alliteration can be applied to Toasted Tuesday and Wasted Wednesday. I think you get the idea. While on the subject of parties, everyone should attend one frat party. This will help determine how full of crap Asher Roth is.
Join an organization and attend only one meeting: There are dozens of organizations on campus so you are bound to find one that will keep you interested for an hour on a random Tuesday evening. If you are feeling really active you should also start a protest. It doesn’t have to be anything huge, but there will be others who feel the same way.
Get thrown out of an event hosted by SCOPE or MUSO (Creativity counts, violence is the least creative thing ever): Do you have an insanely large and elaborate costume that you haven’t been able to use? Time to dust off that Howard-Taft-stuck-in-a-bathtub costume you once made to impress your old history major crush.
Write a message using SCANTRON bubbles: This is tough to pull off since it’s rare to take an exam that really doesn’t matter in the long run in determining a grade. If you are lucky enough to be given a meaningless test, why not try and write the recipe for alfredo sauce or directions to the nearest Arby’s.
Pretend to write a novel at Breaking New Grounds: Writing isn’t writing unless people in public know that you are, in fact, writing. Get your favorite scarf, order something complicated, and play the part of the best indie, post-modern writer that this town has ever seen. If people ask you what you’re writing, just scoff at them, and then go back to playing solitaire.
Participate in a campus wide capture the flag game or a snowball fight: These ideas have been attempted before, but when groups or even the university puts them on, they seem to fall flat. It’s probably because these activities aren’t wholly genuine. A real snowball fight or capture the flag game starts with a large group of people dedicated to the idea. A snowball fight could start with 20 or so people and just sort of, ahem, snowball from there. A capture the flag game would draw campus wide interest if each team had a shirt (failing that, a piece of paper affixed to a shirt) that said, “Hey, I’m playing capture the flag. Join us.” We think this would work better than expected by most.
Tour The Red Hook Brewery/Visit the Portsmouth Brewery: The Red Hook tour is only a dollar, and the guy who runs the tour is this old dude who has been doing it since before all of us were born. He could do the thing blindfolded and is worth the price of admission alone. Provided that you are of age to consume a fermented beverage, free samples await you during and after the tour. The Portsmouth Brewery doesn’t offer the same thing, but it has (seriously) some of the best beers I have ever had. The Russian Imperial Stout tastes like amazing!
Take Germs (MICR 407): If you have at least a pulse and an ability to show up to some classes, you’re almost assured an A. This class was designed for people who still think school should have pizza parties (and I do).
Roll down every hill on campus: This is a bucket list idea strictly for me. You’re welcome to join, though. They are public hills.
Prank your roommate: I don’t consider pelting your friends in the face with oranges as a prank, by the way. I categorize that under assault. Delicious, delicious assault.
Hang up a bizarre banner over the MUB Food Court: A sign that says “Lepers Anonymous Meetings” is sure to get some attention.
Get a shirt made at Town and Campus: You only need seven other friends and a shirt idea to do this. Well, you will also need money. Think of the possibilities here. You could create your own army. The Twilight fans on campus all ready did. They didn’t get sparkles on their shirts, though. What kind of Twilighters are they?
This campus provides a multitude of opportunities to do something fun, creative, and worth mentioning to people you meet down the road. Although, you may want to hold off on telling certain people that you threw a fish at the dance floor. That may be considered weird in some circles.
Stay classy, not UMassy.
Labels:
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hockey,
new hampshire,
traditions,
UNH
Monday, March 8, 2010
MGMT Coming to UNH
Just when I thought SCOPE couldn't get any stupider, they go out and do something like this, and totally redeem themselves! I take back anything bad I have ever said about SCOPE because MGMT is perfect for a college crowd. Think about it, you get the aesthetic values and musicianship of a band and you get funky bass lines to show off your dance moves. I did some research and when they preform live they play with a full band, but with songs like "Kids" they just sing over a recording. I am very excited for this show and will most likely miss both my Wednesday morning classes to wait in line. At only $15 for a student ticket ($36 for non-students) this show will definitely sell out and bring in some much needed dough. Well done SCOPE and thank you. I have heard they aren't as good live but I bet this show will be memorable. Well, it will be very fun, I may or may not actually remember too much from that night. Yes, there will be many substances around campus that night.
Stay classy, not UMassy.
Labels:
fieldhouse,
MGMT,
SCOPE,
UNH
Saturday, March 6, 2010
UNH Hockey East Regular Season Champs
Last night the UNH Men's hockey team came from 3 goals down in the final period to tie BC and clinch the regular season title. Regular season titles are really nice, but now the real fun begins with the Hockey East tourney and hopefully the NCAA's, which UNH would really have to choke to miss. I have never been a big fan of Umile, and he is definitely overpaid, but I would like to think that he said the right things before the 3rd period last night. UNH wraps up the season tonight at BC, before shifting all their focus to their first round opponent, which depending on the final games tonight could be Vermont, Northeastern, UMass or Merrimack.
Stay classy, not UMassy.
Labels:
hockey,
hockey east,
NCAA Hockey,
UNH,
wildcats
Friday, March 5, 2010
Playoff crowd in jeopardy
Tonight the UNH men's hockey team plays their final home game of the regular season. Although they have already clinched a spot to host a first round game of the Hockey East playoffs this is sure to be one of the loudest games of the season. I have attended most of the home games this year and UNH fans have been treated to some great games.The Wildcats play two games against BC, one tonight at the Whit and again tomorrow at BC. UNH is currently first in Hockey East, just ahead of BC, and they only need to tie one game to clinch the top seed. If you're attending tonight's game be sure to check out today's sports column in TNH by Zack Cox.
Now, you're probably wondering why I said tonight's game will be the loudest of the season if they get to host at least two playoff games. It is because those games are scheduled for Friday March 12th and Saturday the 13th. That means that the majority of the UNH student body will have already left campus for spring break. That is the second year in a row that has happened and it is unacceptable. UNH always says how they want athletics to become a focal point of the university, yet they are sending almost the entire student body home before the biggest hockey games of the season. That is a shame and the team deserves a big crowd for to make for a true playoff atmosphere. UNH leads Hockey East in attendance, but I guarantee the student section will be terrible for next weekend's games. There is a simple solution to this problem, for UNH to let students stay until Saturday afternoon. Dining Halls wouldn't have to be opened and students could see at least the first game next week. I understand that UNH just wants the students to leave for spring break, but our pride of having the best team, and the best fans, in Hockey East are at stake if we can't fill up the Whit for a home playoff game. It happened last year (and the team lost both games) and it is looking like it could happen again this year. Hopefully with a different outcome.
Stay classy, not UMassy.
Now, you're probably wondering why I said tonight's game will be the loudest of the season if they get to host at least two playoff games. It is because those games are scheduled for Friday March 12th and Saturday the 13th. That means that the majority of the UNH student body will have already left campus for spring break. That is the second year in a row that has happened and it is unacceptable. UNH always says how they want athletics to become a focal point of the university, yet they are sending almost the entire student body home before the biggest hockey games of the season. That is a shame and the team deserves a big crowd for to make for a true playoff atmosphere. UNH leads Hockey East in attendance, but I guarantee the student section will be terrible for next weekend's games. There is a simple solution to this problem, for UNH to let students stay until Saturday afternoon. Dining Halls wouldn't have to be opened and students could see at least the first game next week. I understand that UNH just wants the students to leave for spring break, but our pride of having the best team, and the best fans, in Hockey East are at stake if we can't fill up the Whit for a home playoff game. It happened last year (and the team lost both games) and it is looking like it could happen again this year. Hopefully with a different outcome.
Stay classy, not UMassy.
Thursday, March 4, 2010
This week in Dining: Old People want salt too
There was an old guy (like 70ish) sitting at the table next to me. This is what he said: "This goddamn place doesn't have any salt!" He continued to rant about it and I had myself a good laugh. That is all I have to say about dining, other than the fact that the sign I spoke about last week has been removed. I call that a win.
One final note: I would like to say that I honestly do like criticism so I can improve my writing and blogging, but I have been taking a lot of flak over my last article about RAs. I will admit I was on a little rampage that morning, but I need to make something clear. From day one I have said to never take anything I write too seriously because I make fun of different groups of people pretty much every week. I have been doing that on the blog for almost an entire year. (Holy shit!) When I make fun of or criticize cops, the administration, President Huddleston, or dining most people just laugh. (Except for those who work at dining.) But then I joke about how some RAs are on a power-trip and every fucking RA or former RA freaks out. Jeez, lighten up and smoke a joint or something! (Joking, haha... awkward) How come I can poke fun at other groups and you laugh along, but I joke about RAs and some get all defensive? It's like that old saying "If you laugh at one group of people, you got to laugh at them all." Besides, the main point of that article was to simply state that sometimes taking names down isn't necessary for first time offenders. I have been criticized before, but I never have and never will change what I do or say.
Stay Classy, not UMassy.
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
A Reader Email and Extreme Munchies
The following is a reader email I got last night:
Im 17 and a junior in New York State. I want to go to UNH because ive been to the campus and it seems pretty awesome. It seems like a pretty well rounded school and what id like my college to be. I took a little tour and everything, ate at the cute little sandwich etc. but i didnt learn enough. Imna be really honest. I love me some happy juice. how free would you say the happy juice flows in UNH? I want to imagine keg wonderlands hidden deep in the New Hampshire wilderness... and the smell of Stella Artois & Yuengling B/T (my favorite) filling every dorm room. So what can you tell me about the parties/ drinking of UNH? its a crutial part of my college career. I do not take my drinking lightly. Another part would of course be the women. Im talking in general here. Are they hicks? When i was on campus (a few months ago) the average seemed to be less than ideal. Of course i saw a very small sample... but it wasnt lookin too good. If i was to go to UNH, would there be a good selection? I dont do drugs... so i really dont care about that aspect of UNH... but i wanna know all about the blondes/booze. I know you cant really speak for the student population of the future but there must be some trends you can tell me about. Some info on admissions would be helpful too. Im currently in Trig/ALG 2 and it blows. Im not doing that great in a few subjects. Would you say UNH is hard to get into? I really do like UNH but it has to be able to give me the college experence that i want. Im pretty sure you have an idea of what that is for me by now. (HINT: booze is to mouth as women is to bed) But i am a nice guy too, i swear to god. Id also like to know if there is a pattern of nice girls that go there so Will can love someone. That would be great. Thanks for any help you can provide.
That was probably one of the best emails I've received since starting the blog and I was honored that I would be contacted. Needless to say, I replied with honesty explaining UNH's night life, availability of alcohol and the beautiful women. Of course most high schoolers think that they will be able to roll up to any party and get in so I explained what college life is really like. UNH is a pretty awesome place, but I have yet to discover a "keg wonderland" in the heart of college woods...
So last night I had used my vape and I got an extreme case of the munchies, like worst than I've ever had them. I decided to hit up the vending machine in the basement of my dorm. I walk out in the hallway and the first thing I hear is a girl down the hall say to a guy "I can still taste it in my mouth." I immediately say "Ew" louder than I meant and then start laughing. Out loud. I couldn't help it. I decide not to take the elevator because I couldn't imagine having to be in a small room with complete strangers. I took the stairs down to the basement and to the vending machine. I decide to get a bag of peanuts and Doritos. Then I decided to get a second bag of Doritos, but it gets stuck. I couldn't shake the machine because someone was doing laundry so I realize that I must buy a 3rd bag of Doritos. Luckily it gave me both packages. As I bend down to grab my snacks someone gets inline behind me. So, at about 11:30 p.m. I turn around with three bags of Doritos and one bag of peanuts. I have to bit my lip not to laugh because I can picture what I look like. There was no denying that I had the munchies so I made a beeline to my room and chowed down. And it was delicious.
Stay classy, not UMassy.
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Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Like a Pro: Dealing with RAs
The other night I found myself at a party at a friend’s apartment. Everyone was is a good mood, having fun and enjoying the college lifestyle. There was no Ke$ha or Miley Cyrus to be heard; all was good. Epic battles of Beirut were going down in the kitchen and on the living room table a game of kings was being played. Other people stood around sharing tales of their glory days of high school sports and other general conversational topics from classes to internships. Then came the knock on the door.
The knock came from two RAs because it was after the 1 a.m. quiet hours. Earlier, one of the residents had asked everyone to keep it down, but unfortunately that didn’t last too long. One RA spoke and said something along the lines of “You guys are being too loud. Unless you are sleeping here you all have to leave. Form a single file line and have your IDs ready so we can take down your names and ask a few questions.” That was it. No warning. Nothing. It was your typical power-tripping “I got picked on in high school so I became an RA,” the worst type of RA. While the two RAs talked with one of the residents, I grabbed my backpack and started the line out the door. I went first because I was feeling confident and knew others might need a little more time to collect themselves.
I handed over my ID, gave them my date of birth and informed them that I had not been drinking. I was free to go. I waited outside for a few friends and to make sure everyone was leaving OK. Despite the fact that the music was turned down low, the amount of conversations and laughing was apparently loud enough to call attention to the apartment. As I stood outside, I wondered if they would bust the party next door too; and the one that was above us, and the one in the next building over. Noise violations are always the easiest way to get written up by an RA or CA and if you are not prepared they can lead to more serious violations, which could attract the police.
When it comes to dealing with RAs it is very important to know ahead of time what type of RA they are, and this is a lot easier if you live in a dorm compared to the Gables or Woodsides. There are really two main classifications that RAs fit into; there is the power hungry kind and the “I need free housing” kind. Those in the first group are going to use all that power they have to make themselves feel better by ruining the night of fellow students who are just looking to have a good time. They, like many of Durham and UNH’s finest, are on a massive power trip and love the fact that they get to tell people what to do. Sure they are just doing their jobs, but a verbal warning is always nice. The best RAs are the ones who just want the free housing; as long as you are not rude to them they will usually let you off with a warning. They aren’t there to just bust people or make themselves feel important, they just want to get free housing.
Despite a few verbal warnings, I have never been written up for anything, not even a noise violation. It is all about preparation, showing courtesy and obeying quiet hours. If you are in a regular dorm room, and under 21, make sure that nothing is visible from the door if there is a knock. That means having a place to quickly stash all your “Gatorade” and “Mountain Dew.” Try to avoid using anything that will emit curious odors. Also, if you are playing Beirut, always use water cups. It is way easier to hide one drink each than all those cups. Plus, it is more sanitary; trust me, I aced Germs.
If you are hosting a gathering be sure to keep the volume as a reasonable level and don’t be afraid to ask people to leave if they can’t settle down. As a guest always do what the host asks and respect their rules. The bottom line is when you have to deal with RAs or CAs, as painful as it may sound, is to be respectful because it is better than having to deal with the police.
Stay classy, not UMassy.
Monday, March 1, 2010
Did you see this comment?
So on my debut "This Week in Dining" post from last week the following comment was anonymously posted earlier today:
"Dining's policy on food leaving the dining hall has not changed. You may take one hand fruit, fill your mug club travel mug with a beverage or take a cookie/brownie from one of our locations. The sign pictured above was meant to remind guests that things should not be taken from the dining hall (other than what is listed above)Things like full bags of cereal, bagels and prepared sandwiches. If you would like to address your concerns with UNH Dining Services, it might make more sense to communicate directly with Jon Plodzik (jon.plodzik@unh.edu)rather than in a blog of this nature. Thank you."
I really wonder if that was the Jon Plodzik and I would be truly honored if it was because that means the blog must be making some noise. Awesome. It had to at least be a dining employee because they said "our locations." Anyways, I responded with the following:
"I actually did find that out this weekend and was going to make the correction. On the large sign above it says"Our new policy requires that all food and beverages be consumed within the dining hall" so I guess I misinterpreted what "new policy" and "all food and beverages" meant. I did notice the smaller sign on the door that says explains that mugs and fruit ect... can be taking. The new bigger sign made me assume that the policy had been changed."
My vendetta against dining continues. And what the fuck does he mean by "blog of this nature." I am offended. That is a low blow and uncalled for. Horse shit!
Stay Classy, not UMassy.
"Dining's policy on food leaving the dining hall has not changed. You may take one hand fruit, fill your mug club travel mug with a beverage or take a cookie/brownie from one of our locations. The sign pictured above was meant to remind guests that things should not be taken from the dining hall (other than what is listed above)Things like full bags of cereal, bagels and prepared sandwiches. If you would like to address your concerns with UNH Dining Services, it might make more sense to communicate directly with Jon Plodzik (jon.plodzik@unh.edu)rather than in a blog of this nature. Thank you."
I really wonder if that was the Jon Plodzik and I would be truly honored if it was because that means the blog must be making some noise. Awesome. It had to at least be a dining employee because they said "our locations." Anyways, I responded with the following:
"I actually did find that out this weekend and was going to make the correction. On the large sign above it says"Our new policy requires that all food and beverages be consumed within the dining hall" so I guess I misinterpreted what "new policy" and "all food and beverages" meant. I did notice the smaller sign on the door that says explains that mugs and fruit ect... can be taking. The new bigger sign made me assume that the policy had been changed."
My vendetta against dining continues. And what the fuck does he mean by "blog of this nature." I am offended. That is a low blow and uncalled for. Horse shit!
Stay Classy, not UMassy.
Monday Updates
This weekend only solidified my hate for RA's. Well, technically they were two CA's at the Woodsides, but they still sucked. They felt it was necessary to make everyone leave a small party, which seemed reasonable because we were being kind of loud, but they also made sure to check ID's and take down everyone's name. They gave no warning or anything. When they told to form a line I knew that there were certain people their who would A) need a moment to gather themselves and B) think of a way to avoid giving their name because of who they are/positions they hold. So I grabbed my bag and took my place at the front of the line. Instead of giving a fake name I handed over my ID because I knew it would better to make it quick. I gave told them my birthdate and informed them I had not been drinking. And she bought it. Others who were 21 told the truth and some gave fake names. Once outside I waited for a few people to walk back with and assisted others out a back window. Great success. My column in tomorrow's paper while go into further detail about how to deal with RA's so be sure to check that out if you're interested.
In other UNH news, the men's hockey team has just two regular season games left and only one at home. They play second place BC in a home and home series this weekend. They just need to tie one of those games to clinch the top seed for the Hockey East tournament. They will host at least two games in the first round, but they will be after most of campus has left for break so that really sucks. The women's hockey team will be the number 2 seed in their tournament which is held at Providence this year.
The men's basketball team finished their regular season with a big win over first place Stoney Brook. They will face Vermont, the number 2 seed, a team we beat and lost to in overtime, in the first round of the America East Tournament. EDIT (9:35 p.m.) Binghamton, who would have been the 5 seed, dropped from the tournament due to findings in a recent investigation. Therefore UNH as moved up to the 6 seed and will play Maine in the first round who blew us out twice in the regular season.
Stay Classy, Not UMassy.
In other UNH news, the men's hockey team has just two regular season games left and only one at home. They play second place BC in a home and home series this weekend. They just need to tie one of those games to clinch the top seed for the Hockey East tournament. They will host at least two games in the first round, but they will be after most of campus has left for break so that really sucks. The women's hockey team will be the number 2 seed in their tournament which is held at Providence this year.
The men's basketball team finished their regular season with a big win over first place Stoney Brook. They will face Vermont, the number 2 seed, a team we beat and lost to in overtime, in the first round of the America East Tournament. EDIT (9:35 p.m.) Binghamton, who would have been the 5 seed, dropped from the tournament due to findings in a recent investigation. Therefore UNH as moved up to the 6 seed and will play Maine in the first round who blew us out twice in the regular season.
Stay Classy, Not UMassy.
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