Drink Of The Week: Cheap Beer

Because this is college, right? When it comes down to the bottom line the best alcohol to bring to a college party is cheap beer. I am not talking $20 30's like Coors Light, I'm talking in the $14-$18 range like Natty Light or Keystone. Why, cheap you ask? Because on the whole we are all pretty much poor. Plus, if someone snags your bag full of beer its much better to have it be full of Keystone Light and not some Sam Adams or something nicer. One knock about beer is that it tends to go fast. Between two roommates a 30 probably won't last a full weekend (especially if you're including Thursday nights). A big handle on the other hand is much more likely to last longer. Also with beer, it is much more tempting to have a couple during the week and with cheap beer that can be a waste if you're not getting wasted.

On the other hand beer is much better to bring to a party since you can drink more of it. Brining a water bottle with cranberry vodka is not going to last long at a party, especially there are a lot of drinking games going on. That brings up my next point about cheap beer, it is the best alcohol for drinking games. Whether it is beirut, kings, asshole, fuck the dealer or any other game, beer is the way to go. If you're playing a drinking game with rum or vodka or any type of hard alcohol you'll be lucky to last a game or two. While Natty Light and Keystone Light seem to be the campus favorite cheep beers I actually prefer PBR.

Personally, I think PBR has a better taste than most cheap beers, despite it's high carbonation. Most cheap beers taste very watery, while PBR does have a little better flavor. It also has a slightly higher alcohol content (5.7%) compared to most beers in it's price range and quality. Keystone Light is only 4.2%. But at the same time PBR isn't a light beer so that would make sense. Most light beers are in the low to mid 4% alcohol range, but heavier beers are usually around 5% (but range up to 10% or higher).
Since PBR isn't a light beer it has 50 more calories than Keystone Light.  Drinking a lot of cheap beers will result in mass drunkenness and probably a decent hangover, but what do you expect? You get what you pay for. Most cheap beers are pretty similar, I just like the slightly higher content that PBR has to offer. When it comes to light beers, I would put Keystone just ahead of Natty. I know that everyone has their preferences, but let's face it cheap beer is cheap beer.

Stay classy, not UMassy.

Drink Of The Week: Sailor Jerry Spiced Rum

Sailor Jerry's is my new favorite reasonably priced rum. By a long shot. I had it for the first time last weekend and I achieved great levels of drunkenness. I can't believe I had missed out on Sailor Jerry for so long. At about $18 a bottle (750 ml) it is a few dollars cheaper than Captain Morgan's or Bacardi. And it comes in a way cooler bottle. The original Sailor Jerry was considered the father of old school tattooing and if there was ever a man to name rum after it was him. Total Badass. Sailor Jerry's is 92 proof, or 46% alcohol, so it is also stronger than your average rum. However, that doesn't show in the taste. With any alcohol you get that little after burn, but unlike most cheap alcohol Sailor Jerry delivers some nice flavor with it. Whether you like to take shots or mix your rum with some coke, Sailor Jerry's is the way to go.

This is some legitimate rum here, I'm not talking about Malibu or Parrot Bay, this stuff is what pirates would drink. Why is the rum gone you ask? Because it was so good I drank it all. Strong, smooth, and a little spiced. Mmm! Another good thing about this rum is that it didn't come with a terrible hangover that I kind of expected after a night of drinking 92 proof rum. Since it doesn't taste like acid dog pee your drunkitude might take you by surprise when you stand up, so make sure you got your sea legs before you trek to DHop.There is also a good chance you'll end up on the floor a drink or two earlier than usual because that extra 12 proof (compared to the average hard alcohol drink) doesn't seem like much, but it adds up. If you're not careful it can kick your ass, but I think everyone is in need of a good ass kicking once and a while. It doesn't taste overly sweet and the best part is it doesn't have that gross cocoanut rum taste like "chick" rums do. I was mixing it pretty strong with some diet coke and I loved the taste, but I'll admit it got better as the night went on. 

Stay classy, not UMassy.

Drink Of The Week: Svedka

For the first DOTW of the semester I am going with the drink I would say I get the most. Svedka is cheap vodka, but still decent quality. For $20 a handle you get vodka that doesn't taste like complete shit. (See: zhenka.) The quality of Svedka is in between Grey Goose and zhenka, meaning you won't want to sip on it, unless you're straight from Russia, (or Sweden) but it tastes fine with some orange juice, cranberry juice and I'm told, in martinis. At 40% alcohol (80 proof) the price per alcohol content is actually pretty cheap.

My favorite drink with Svedka is a screwdriver, simply orange juice and vodka. I can only handle so much orange juice, plus it's expensive, so if I'm planning on having a few drinks I usually go with some cranberry juice, which is known as a Cape Cod or Cape Coder. Vodka is known to sneak up on you so pay attention to your intake or you'll be puking all night... or the next morning. The thing I like about Svedka is that you are able to mix it with just about anything and it doesn't result in you instantly feeling like shit and waking up with an insane hangover. I can't guarantee that, but every time I've had other cheap vodkas (zhenka) I have bad hangovers. During my freshman year I used to drink Svedka and diet Coke. Don't do that, it tastes absolutely terrible, stick with juices. Vodka can be tough to take as a shot, but if your fridge has a freezer cold vodka is much smoother to drink or take a shot of when it is chilled. I just have a mini dorm fridge with a tiny freezer compartment so I usually poor some vodka into a water bottle or two and let it get real cold. There are hundreds of other mixes with vodka, but those are a few of my personal favorites.

Stay classy, not UMassy.

Drink Of The Week: Sangria

Jay-Z says it best in his version of “Young Forever” with the line “So let’s just stay in the moment, smoke some weed, drink some wine, reminisce, talk some shit, forever young is in your mind.”

I’m sure that when he wrote that line he pictured some damn expensive wine. Well, sometimes college students can’t afford that. This is why Carlo Rossi Sangria is a great purchase if you’re looking for some deliciously cheap red wine. Don’t get me wrong, when it comes to alcohol beer is always my first choice. Some Sam Adams seasonal or Newcastle Brown Ale are two of my personal favorites, and when it comes to cheaper beer I argue there is none better than PBR, despite its high carbonation. But as a college student who doesn’t work during school sometimes money is an issue and I also like some variety. (Side note my main alcoholic beverage purchases are cheap 30’s or a handle of Svedka. Lately I’ve been working on my taste for whiskey.)

Carlo Rossi has a bunch of different wines, but their Sangria is the best. Plus you can usually find a jug of it at the DUMP. That’s right, I said a jug. I’m talking about $12 for a 4-fucking-liter jug. At 10% it is more than twice the alcohol content of a light beer and it still goes down easy. Seriously, drink it chilled and it tastes like grape juice. Let me repeat some of that info again: For just 12 bucks you get 4 fucking liters… and probably a killer hangover! Bottom Line: Sangria gets you fucked up without taking a big hit from your wallet.

 Guys, you’re drinking red wine so you will feel like a pimp, which will help your confidence with the ladies. From personal experience, you feel even more like a pimp or a rock star (and the alcoholic you’re slowly turning into) if you drink it straight out of the jug.  If you are more of a heavyweight, or just sexually insecure and afraid to drink “gay-ass” wine because you’re not European, (it’s okay I have friends from Europe) many people like adding a shot of vodka to a glass of sangria. But be warned, even at 10% I always get wrecked after a few glasses. I have seen it get the best of some experienced drinkers who would put 95% of our campus to shame in a game of drink. Cheap wine works in mysterious ways, it can put some people to sleep and others will get a boost of energy. And ladies, you will love it too because of its smooth taste and it is healthier than a beer. Some of my best memories (what I can remember of them that is) involve sitting around a fire on the beach up at Bar Harbor, passing around a jug of Sangria. One of those memories involves me ending up in the freezing ocean water at night with all my clothes on, but this isn’t the time to dive into that one.

Stay classy, not UMassy.

Drink Of The Week: Hard Cider

Alright, I'm not trying to tell you what to do... who am I kidding? I am telling you what to do. Before you know it (hopefully) we will be back on UNH's glorious (can't say that with a straight face) campus, and if you're a guy who doesn't like hard alcohol and is sick of beer, try getting some bottles of hard cider in your greasy underage mitts.

I'm sorry to alienate the female gender here, but you know who drinks hard cider? Men. Lumberjacks drink it, pirates drink it (to prevent scurvy while still getting drunk), and mountain men drink it. No, mountain men are not the same thing as lumberjacks. Don't get into this argument with me, and don't change the subject.

Here's a list of activities that get twice as good when you add hard cider into the mix:

• Eating
• Watching sports
• Partying hard
• Partying softly
• Going to a beach
• Wrestling a bear
• Getting into a fight (hard cider also starts this usually)
• Studying
• Wrestling two bears
  

Even gay men can enjoy hard cider! Don't worry, I didn't leave you guys out! Do you want an appletini but don't feel like going through the effort to make it? Just drink a bottle of hard cider! It's just like it! Disclaimer: I have never tried an appletini and do not know the taste or difficulty of making such a drink.

Hard cider goes great with everything: sandwiches, steaks, pizza, wings... even breakfast! Drinking beer with breakfast just feels gross, but with hard cider, it's just a more relaxing apple juice! That way the first thing your taste buds (after a night of making out with fat girls and smoking cloves in front of your dorm to look cool while you're more drunk than Sean Connery on a Friday) get hit with in the morning isn't nasty-ass Keystone Light, but the delicious fusion of alcohol and apples. It's perfect for those homecoming weekends, or just weekends where you start drinking at 9:00 in the morning. If you do that a lot, though, you should seek help.

Now, here are the few setbacks of hard cider. There are only so many places to get it in Durham or Dover, but it's usually available at the DUMP. I'll admit, I've only tried Woodchuck Hard Cider, in Amber and Granny Smith flavors, brewed in New Hampshire's 69-ing partner Vermont, but I feel like tasting those delicious apple nectars is good enough for me. If it tastes great, why try something else to see if it tastes better? That's called greed, and there's no place for that in the mind of a college student. You have a very limited source of money and no one wants to gamble $10 on something that ends up tasting like that bullshit India Pale Ale. I hate that shit.

The Woodchuck Hard Cider (go to the website and look around, THEY HAVE FUCKING KEGS OF THE STUFF I ALMOST SHIT MYSELF WHEN I FOUND THAT OUT) flavors are great, and I'm not sure if they have any more, but I'll tell you that the Amber one is much more sweeter than the Granny Smith one, which is bitter and tart, but still good. Another drawback is the ridiculous amount of sugar in these things, and the fact that it gives you a bitch of a hangover if you don't drink your water before bed. Now, you're wondering, "Rusty, how much do I have to pay for access to this glorious drink that's manly but doesn't taste like balls at the same time?" Well, they only come in 6-packs, and they're about $7 each, which seems rather expensive. I will tell you this though: the alcohol content in each bottle is usually in the range of 5%, and regular light beers like Bud Light or Keystone Light are about 4.2%. It may not seem like much, but if you're someone who doesn't need a lot to get drunk (like me) you can be set for the night with a 6-pack of this shit. It's fucking gold. GOLD.

If you buy hard cider from the DUMP or any stores around campus, the demand increases, so the supply does too. They'll offer more flavors since people are buying more and also (possibly) lower the price a bit if it gets really popular. Of course, this is my ideal, demented view of what should happen and probably not what will happen. Either way, $7 isn't bad for something that you can get drunk off of while still liking the taste of it. I'm fucking looking at you, Natural Light and Busch Light. Stop drinking that shit and get some respect.

Finally, I just want to say that I'm not in any way related to the Woodchuck marketing agency or anything like that. I wish I was though, so I could get a FUCKING KEG of that stuff. I wouldn't ever leave my room. So when we get back to UNH and you're thinking of something to drink during the Super Bowl (even though the Patriots aren't in it, but I'm not going to talk about that), get a 6-pack of this shit and try to tell me you don't like it. Seriously, if you don't like it, just tell me and I'll take the rest of it off of you for no cost.

If you've tried hard cider and hate it, tried hard cider and loved it, have a different type besides Woodchuck (or a totally different beverage altogether), or want to yell at me because you're angry at something that has nothing to do with the content of this post, send something to unhblog@yahoo.com and I'll get it eventually.

Editors Note: Drink of the week will be a new feature for Wednesdays on the blog. Rusty got it started this week and I have a few in storage. We will feature lesser seen drinks on campus and also throw in a few UNH campus favorites here and there.