Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Dining Breaks UNH Social Media Guide (because of me!)

So some of you may remember that last year UNH Dining viciously attacked me via Twitter last April after I complemented them on their fantastic Italian night. Here's a quick reminder:

Dining hasn't liked me since I wrote a column two years ago that pointed out how much money they wasted, how easy it is to steal and other poor choices they make. I was reported to the office of conduct, who never did anything because they knew I did nothing wrong. And of course my supporters voiced their opinion took my side.

So anyways, I had moved on, but this summer a reader sent me an email with a link to UNH's social media guidelines. Here are a few that I think apply to this situation:

These guidelines are designed to help UNH employees who create or contribute to University-related electronic social media to do so in a respectful, professional, relevant way to protect the University’s reputation and mission. We recognize the value in this new medium and encourage participation by UNH units as long as it falls within their communication needs and goals.
  • The same professional standards expected of you on the job should be applied to your conduct in UNH-related social media matters.
  • Post meaningful, respectful comments that are relevant to your position at UNH. So, please—no spam, or remarks that are off-topic or offensive.
  • Use commonsense and courtesy in creating University-related social media content. If you have even the slightest doubt, ask your supervisor if the content you want to post is appropriate—BEFORE you post it!
  • Stick to your area of expertise when posting.
  • If the public shares an opinion that you disagree with on a UNH-related social media site or issue, keep your response appropriate, professional, and polite. Sometimes, it is best to not respond at all.
Once again, dining just breaking all the rules and making dumb decisions. How'd those $32 salt and pepper mills work out anyways?

Stay classy, not UMassy.

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

10 Questions with UNH hockey player Justin Agosta

  1. Why did you choose UNH? Since I was young I knew I always wanted to play in Hockey East and with how reputable UNH is as a hockey program it felt like a perfect fit... When I came on my visit it was white out the whit and that made it a very easy decision as well.. I committed the next morning.
  2. Do you have any pre-game rituals or any teammates that have strange rituals? I am very superstitious so at the start of every season I'll do some random things and then when I have a good game I'll continue to do it.
  3. What’s been your best hockey moment throughout your career? Even though it didn't happen yet, Fenway vs Maine will probably be the best moment of my career.
  4. Who do you see as having a breakout year at UNH? Any freshmen you think could step in and make an impact this year? I think any of our forwards can have a break out year.. I think Burke will have the best chance at having a breakout year.. he was pretty unlucky last year with getting mono and then having some shoulder problems. I also think Nick Sorkin will have a big year.
  5. What’s the best part about being a hockey player at UNH? The best part is with no question our fans. Everyone knows UNH is one of the most exciting places to play and thats because of the fans.
  6. What’s your favorite non-hockey aspect at UNH? Spring time is awesome here.
  7. If the student section were to hold up an “Easy button” after goals, do you think players would hit it? Hahah.. I'm sure someone would do it. I would like to see that.
  8. What music is playing in the locker room before a game? Is there a team DJ? All types of music is playing... I'll have my headphones in most likely.
  9.  This came from another fan, describe one teammate as a fruit or vegetable. Who, what and why? Hah, this is probably the hardest one on here.. have to compare Knodel to cauliflower.. kids whiter then casper.. can't come up with anything else.
  10. Over the summer UNH strength and conditioning director Paul Chapman did the “Slapshot Challenge” at JP’s. What teammate do you think would have the best shot at beating the challenge? If Blake Kessel was still here he would probably beat Chappy.

Monday, August 29, 2011

It begins...

We have only been back for a few days and it has already begun. Please excuse my grammar for this post, I'm still feeling the effects of last night pretty good. I have been getting material left and right because things always seem to happen while I'm in the right place at the right time. For example, the other night I was leaving the Gables with a friend and we were approached by some kid. He seemed  bit lost, probably drunk, and his friends were looking at the Gables map between South and A tower. "Excuse me," he said, "Can you tell me how to get to 32 Young Drive... are we close by?" The first thought that entered my mind was, is there another Young Drive that I don't know about? We then explained that they were at the opposite end of campus and gave the directions. Ahh, freshmen.

 And in other news, last night, or today actually, was my one of my friend's 21st birthdays. This is a kid who  lived next door to me freshmen year and we have had a lot of great nights together. To put it simply, I have never seen anyone so drunk in public before. We got to Scorps at about 11:50 and he was let in early.  30 minutes and something many shots later (including one tsunami - which was appropriate due to the weather) he was asked to leave... by Radar. Yes, that Radar. It was the first time I've ever been with someone who got 86ed and it was hilarious. We left just in time too because it was an adventure getting him back to our DD's car. I mean two of us had to basically carry the kid. During that time, I was recognized as the New Hampshirite by someone who checked out the summer project. I wasn't sure how many people saw that yet, but it was really funny. I think I thanked her many times for reading and I hope I didn't come off as an asshole because of the situation. You know, being that guy who has to drag his friend out of Scorps. In short if was one of those nights that can been filed under the "hilarious college adventure" tab.

Stay classy not UMassy.
(PS: hey UNH, thanks for the beach day on the first day of classes.)

Friday, August 26, 2011

10 Questions with UNH Goalie Tyler Scott

So the other night on a whim I go the idea to try and do some 10 questions with UNH athletes. So I tweeted hockey player Justin Agosta since he was the only hockey player to follow me back on twitter. I figured that meant he was familiar with the blog and he'd be a good person to start with. So he tweeted me back and said goalie Tyler Scott was also interested. So I emailed them each some questions and Scott was the first to reply back. Here's the 10 question interview. I really enjoyed doing this so if you're an athlete or you know some who are familiar with the blog, I'd love to do more of these. They don't take long and are done completely through email.

1. Why did you choose UNH?

The decision to come to UNH, for me, came down to three things:
competitive division 1 ice hockey, the coaching staff, and the campus.
I think it was the campus that really sealed the deal for me.

2. Do you have any pre-game rituals? Any teammates have any weird rituals?

For me, I like to re-tape both of my sticks and check my gear for
anything that I think needs adjustment. After I’ll warm-up with the
soccer ball and sit in the bleachers for a little before I get
dressed. For home games, I like to sit just before all of our student
fans come roaring down the bleachers to get the best seats. Besides
that, I have ritual handshakes with a few guys on the team as we line
up to go on the ice. As for some of the other guys, I know Damon Kipp
has to sit in the number four seat in the top row of whatever stadium
we are playing in after he warms up. It will be interesting to see if
he does it when we go to Fenway.

3. What’s been your best hockey moment throughout your career?

My favorite moment has to be my freshman year when we beat North
Dakota in the first game of Regionals. Thomas Fortney tied the game
with 0.1 seconds left followed by Peter Leblanc’s OT winner and his
pistol celebration. That’s a moment I’ll never forget.

4. Who do you see as having a breakout year at UNH? Any freshmen you
think could step in and make an impact this year?

Hard to say at this point. A lot of different guys, especially the
forwards, are capable of stepping up this season. The freshman will
definitely be an important factor to our team’s success.

5. What’s the best part about being a hockey player at UNH?

The best part by far is our fans and supporters. The fans we have
here at the university and in the area make playing hockey at UNH one
of the most exciting places to play in the country.

6. What’s your favorite non-hockey aspect at UNH?

Besides the campus and school environment, I would have to say the
location of our school. For hockey its great because we are pretty
much located in the middle of our conference traveling wise. As for
the non-hockey aspect of our school’s location, you have entertainment
in Portsmouth, Newmarket, and Dover, great local golfing, the beach,
and a train that takes you straight into Boston. In essence, there is
always something to do at UNH.

7. If you guys really are listening, what is your favorite or the
team’s favorite chant done by the student section?

Personally, I’ve always loved the sieve chants. There’s nothing
better than watching a rival goaltender get flustered after letting in
a goal and being called a sieve right after.

8. Tell us something about Coach Umile that a fan wouldn’t know.

He shows a lot of emotion and compassion in the locker room. You can
tell that our team means the world to him by either hearing one of his
pre-game speeches or watching him celebrate with the team after a big
win. It’s one of the reasons why we compete nationally every year.

9. This came from another fan, describe one teammate as a fruit or
vegetable. Who, what and why?

I guess I would describe Sorkin as celery; tall, skinny, and always
in some sort of vegetative state.

10. What other Hockey East schools have the most hostile student sections?

The Maine student section has always been a hostile environment when
we go up there. On that note, it makes the games that more
competitive. Nothing beats silencing a hostile student section after
we score in their arena.

I'm back!

Nonsensical Nation, another year is upon us! Who else is ready to party? And maybe study a little bit too... maybe. My apartment and room are coming together nicely, but it's fucking hot in here. One quick note, if you're around be sure to check out the Trash to Treasure yard sale over at the fish bowl next to Congreve. They did a great job putting it all together, but all the good stuff is going fast so get to it, especially before Irene comes!

Alright, the main point of this post is to announce that I'll be releasing the summer project today. Like very soon. So be sure to check out the blog's fan page on Facebook or my Twitter page for the links.

It's good to be back! Party! It's not a crime!

Also, the UNH-Maine game at Fenway will be "officially" announced today at a press conference... but we all know who broke that news two weeks ago. So all of you who doubted my sources and credibility...SUCK IT!

Monday, August 22, 2011

Final Summer Project Leak

Classes start in one week. I move in on Thursday. On Friday history will be made. Getchya popcorn ready and follow me on Twitter or "like" the blog on Facebook to see what has never been seen. It won't be on this blog, or linked from this website for a while longer so use social media to put all the clues together.

Oh shit is right. T-Minus four days Nonsensical Nation.

Saturday, August 13, 2011

Quiet Hours Changed in Campus Apartments

So over the next two weeks I have a few posts in store so I can pick up my blogging frequency as move-in weekend approaches. Speaking of which, I'm on the Gables move-in crew, so if you're lucky I'll drop all your favorite possessions. Anyways, I opened up my internet this morning planning to post something I have saved in my drafts. But first I checked all my emails and saw something that has completely rubbed me the wrong way. And surprise, surprise it is from none other than UNH Housing.

The email consisted of move-in weekend information, it spoke of renovations to the Woodsides and Gables apartment and all that stuff. But this is what hit me the wrong way:

We’ve made a few changes in policies. The one that might be the biggest is that we moved quiet hours back one hour so that the UNH Residence Halls and the UNH On-Campus Apartments have the same standards. Quiet hours will begin at 10pm on Sunday through Thursday and at 12:00 am on Friday and Saturday evenings. This may be tough for some to have to quiet down an hour earlier, but overall, we believe that this is best for the communities and best for consistency.

This is a bigger outrage than UNH Dining replacing Panache with a Dunkin' Donuts. (Which is was I was going to write about, but honestly it doesn't bother me as much as other people have complained.) This is a bigger outrage than when Dining replaced all the salt shakers with a few of those big salt and pepper mills. This is a bigger outrage than the spy camera. This is borderline state funding cut outrage.

The best part about living in the Woodsides and Gables are those added perks that you don't get in the regular residence halls. You know, the added personal freedoms that comes with experience on a college campus. Things like not having an RA on every floor and having that extra hour are huge bonuses for the students that live in the campus apartments. In fact, many of us pay higher housing rates just for that reason. I might as well move back into Williamson if we're gonna be babied like this.

This is clearly a power move by UNH and Housing to try and curb the party atmosphere of the Woodsides and Gables. Listen, the 10PM weekday move doesn't even bother me. But if you've ever lived in the Woodsides or Gables, you know how nice that extra hour is on Friday and Saturday nights. If I knew about this move ahead of time there is noway I would be spending my senior year in the Gables. It really is that much of a difference. I am planning on letting housing and the apartment staff know how bad of a decision this is and I hope you do too. (Feel to email apartment director Michael Saputo at

Stay classy, not UMassy.

PS: Is housing going to read me a story and tuck me in at night too? See you in two weeks. I hope my stereo is loud enough for you all to hear what I really think about this.

PPS: Can I at least have my dessert or do I have to go straight to bed?

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Frozen Fenway: aka Lake Whittemore South

Ladies and gentlemen of Nonsensical Nation, mark your calenders because on January 7th, 2012 the University of New Hampshire men's hockey team will take on their arch-rival, the Black Bears of UMaine-Orono at the historical Fenway Park in Boston. It will be apart of a double header that also features Vermont and UMass, but every knows UNH-Maine is the main event. Last year UNH took the season series in a 3-0 sweep and with Maine losing Wildcat killer (I'll admit it) Gustav Nyquist to the pros, there's no reason to think UNH can't sweep again. On top of that, last I checked Maine still doesn't have a goalie. Maine might be the home team, but Fenway is about to become Lake Whittemore South. It may be during winter break, but I'm calling for a pre-game party train ride down from Durham. Who knows, I may even make my apartment available for pre-pre-game pre-train ride festivities. It may be cold so be sure to dress appropriate (painted up) to keep that Wildcat Blood warm (enough).

... and just incase The Maine Guy tries to post some trash talk...
I've single handedly conquered Maine before. Warm Ice Cubes, bitches. No hard feelings, buddy.

Game 1: UNH Win.

Game 2: UNH Win.

Game 3: UNH Win...

PPS/Update: Last year for men's hockey BC and BU played, so Northeastern really got shafted, huh? I kinda feel bad for the doghouse... I must admit, I love Matthew's Arena. The atmosphere, history and architecture is one of a kind. My favorite Hockey East venue I've visited, by far.

Saturday, August 6, 2011

The Little League World Series Drinking Game

While I was working the other day, I thought of a new drinking game for the end of summer. If you have read the title of this post, you will have seen that I have found a way to get hammered while watching 12-year-olds live out their glory days on ESPN. This is the best I can do because one of my life-long goals was to play in the LLWS and I think I have finally hit the Danny Almonte stage of getting caught. I give you The Little League World Series Drinking Game:

One Sip:
  •  Anytime the following are named "favorite MLB Player" - Any Yankee or Red Sox player, Albert Puljos, Ryan Howard, Ichiro Suzuki, Tim Lincecum
  • Favorite MLB player is retired or linked to steroids
  • A homerun is hit
  • Plus fastball: A pitch is adjusted to 95+ mph
  • Whenever the "special pinch runner" rule is used
  • A player names "Shaun White" as his favorite XGame Althete
  • A player names "recess" or "lunch" as his favorite subject
Two Sips:
  • Two or more errors committed on same play
  • Favorite MLB player is dead
  • Player cries after being hit by pitch
  • Outfielder makes routine catch that announcers call a web gem
  • A pitch is adjusted to 100+ MPH
  • A batter is over 6 feet tall
  • ESPN shows the tallest player in the tournament standing next to or back-to-back with the shortest
  • Orel Hershiser (or any announcer) compares a kid to a major league player
Three Sips:
  • Coach's son pitches/plays shortstop and hits 3rd or 4th
  • An over coaching situation, coach grabs player by shoulders/ cheeks for face-to-face "focus" time
  • A pitcher shakes the hand of a batter he hit
  • No hitter is thrown or 12+ strikeouts
  • Outfielder makes a diving catch where he didn't need to dive or slowed his run so he could dive
  • A batter is over 6'3''
  • Mercy rule is put into effect
Finish Drink:
  • When there is a closeup of a player crying after losing
  • A batter is over 175 pounds
  • A player throws a no-hitter (or 12+ Ks) and hits a homerun in the same game
  • Little League player has a "Brain Wilson Beard" (or any facial hair)
  • Game is ended with a walk-off error or bases loaded walk

Stay classy, not UMassy

Monday, August 1, 2011

2011 Princeton Review Rankings

Once again the Princeton Review has blessed us with meaningless rankings that will cause UNH students to both brag and bicker about (and provide the Union Leader with even more pointless bullshit to try and make us look bad). So, without any further ado, here are the lists that UNH found itself on:

Best Campus Food: #17
Little Race/Class Interaction: #2
Lots of Beer: #2
Town Relations are Strained: #15
Listed on "Best Northeast Colleges"

These are the lists UNH has been off and on again for years. I have to admit, I'm pretty proud of our #2 ranking for lots of beer. My roommates and I feel that we have contributed significantly to that one. Durham residents hate us, even though they wouldn't have a town without us. Lets face it, apart from our athletic teams, UNH is practically 98% white and middle class. Even our dining halls do have their moments. Although they are jerks our food really isn't too bad, especially with their themed dinners such as the local harvest and seafood nights. Just invite a friend from another school up for a weekend and let them use a guest pass and they'll tell you that we have it made. I really don't have too much to say on these rankings, they pretty much speak for themselves and they have no real meaning... for example, remember that whole "UNH name Druggiest College" by The Daily Beast? We didn't even crack the Princeton's Review's lists for "Reefer Madness" or "Party Schools."

Please note that UMaine was  ranked 17th for least happy students. I guess that should be a no brainer because there is no way to be happy in that frozen tundra. Bunch of sourpusses up in Orono (cue Maine Guy comment in 3,2,1...)

In other news, don't forget you can buy books really cheap through the blog. You can help me maintain my unhealthy drinking habits while simaltaneously saving hundreds of dollars. I honestly saved close to $200 last year. Simply click the "Bookstore" tab above or see the side bar. Filling out the ISBN number will result in the best searches. (Tip: go the the MUB bookstores website and do a book search by your classes section to get all the ISBN number for all the books you need.) And if you think I'm selling out, I only get a fraction of the money. Last year readers spent hundreds of dollars on books through the blog and I only made about $40, so I'm doing this more for you not me.  But still, buy books here. I can never have enough beer money, UNH has to keep that number 2 ranking and my liver and I are willing to make the sacrifice.

Stay tuned for more posts over the next few weeks, including the unleashing of my summer project. Until then,

Stay classy, not UMassy.