Alcohol: The Gasoline of the College Student

 It gives us motivation, it keeps us going through good times and bad, it provides us with a reason to celebrate and it is always just a little bit too expensive.

Alcohol is the college student's gasoline.

Just like our more productive members of society who always need to save money to pay for gas, college students are always sure to have enough money for a weekend's worth of booze. Not every college student drinks alcohol, but not everyone relies on gas. That is what bikes, electricity and running shoes are for.

Alcohol is the college student's savior. It helps us celebrate following a solid performance on an exam, project, lab report or paper. But it is also there for us when we need to feel better following an equally poor performance. Alcohol lets you step outside your normal comfort zone in good ways. You may never bust out "Sweet Child O' Mine" at karaoke sober, but after a few gin and tonics you will be the reincarnation of Axl Rose himself. It might be embarrassing in the afterthought, but you had the time of your life when you took center stage.

Now, some of you may argue that coffee is the real gasoline of the college student, but let me explain why it is not. While it may give you energy in the morning or help you stay up that extra hour to study, coffee doesn't compare to all the bonuses of alcohol. When you finish up an exam or a rough week of schoolwork, you don't sit back with a hot cup of coffee to celebrate. No, you break out something special. And by special, I do not mean Keystone or Natty Light, and definitely not a hard alcohol that comes in a plastic bottle. I am talking like a decent six or 12 pack; I may go with Newcastle or a Sam Adams variety pack. If I'm looking to really celebrate, I'm going with Wild Turkey bourbon, because there is no way anything bad could possibly happen.

Some students may see a fun-filled alcohol weekend as motivation to get one's work done ahead of time. It may not be the best method, but let's face it, no student becomes motivated by thinking, "If I finish this research paper by Thursday afternoon I'm going to drink so much coffee this weekend!" And lastly, what do people put in coffee to make it even better? Bailey's Irish Cream. Enough said.

If you claim that energy drinks are the true gasoline of the college student, let me ask you a question: Have you ever heard of a Jagerbomb or a Red Bull and vodka? Vodka might be my least favorite of all hard alcohols, but it makes Red Bull that much better. Before I go on, I should probably explain why vodka is my least favorite alcohol. Other than a White Russian or a screwdriver, I do not think vodka has much to offer. It definitely doesn't make you any cooler like the other major hard alcohols.

For example, whiskey, while also a favorite drink of the Irish, is the true American drink. After a lot of whiskey, you will only lose arguments to people who have drunk more whiskey than you, and you will also believe that you are better than everyone else. Whiskey was the drink of the American cowboys and on top of that, bourbons, a type of whiskey, must be made in America and nowhere else. If you drink bourbon, you are directly contributing to the American economy. Gin was a common drink among old blues musicians, and there is arguably no one more badass then an old blues musician. Last, but certainly not least, rum makes you feel like a pirate.

Alcohol doesn't give humanity a bad name; rather, a select percentage of our population gives alcohol a bad name. People who drink irresponsibly take away from all the best parts of alcohol: the fun times and the memories it helps provide. It is no secret that college students drink, and it is actually pretty acceptable when done correctly.

If you need any more proof of why alcohol is the gasoline of the college student, think of this: How many times have you woken up, head pounding, mouth and throat dry, stomach hurting and you promise to never do that again? Yet the next night you are back at it because you remember you had the time of your life the night before.

Stay classy, not UMassy.

The Straw Factor

I know people have complained that sometimes I write too much about drinking and alcohol and all that, but what can I say. I like to drink. But this is a serious question. Is it always girly to drink out of a straw? Like I get that if it was a more feminine drink, or even a "neutral" drink, or definitely something straight up, but say I am drinking a whiskey and coke out of a mason jar and the ice is blocking easy access for the drink to enter my mouth, a straw would negate that problem. It creates an easier flow so more alcohol can be consumed in less time. It's like the Miller Lite vortex bottle. Also if you have facial hair like me one of the last things you want is cheap smelling and tasting alcohol on your mustache. A straw prevents this. When you go to the bars on campus they almost always give you a straw, especially during well drink specials or beat the clock hours. This is an honest question: is it okay for me to drink using a straw, keeping in mind that it is a cheap whiskey and coke out of a mason jar? Usually I wouldn't even have thought about it, but the other night a female friend of mine said it would be girly when I mentioned getting straws at the store. I mean, if I have a nice drink, like a straight whiskey sour, definitely no straw. But cheap whiskey in a mason jar is another story. And don't think that I'm self-conscious or something, I Steven Glansberg it almost everyday at HoCo.

Stay classy, not UMassy.

Whiskey Time!

The Maine Guy is coming to Durham and I got my first handle of whiskey of the year. I had been on a gin kick, but it's whiskey time, which means that I'm ready to turn up to 11. Party!

This is my whiskey trifecta of songs. My playlist has plenty of hip-hop and popular college party music,   but it's good to have a little variety as well.

Whiskey pre-game pump up:

And when the clock strikes midnight and you're feeling pretty good, belt this one out with your friends:

And this one is after you can rage no more and are ready to wind down. Learn the lyrics and sing along because when the time is right, this song cannot be beat:

New Hampshirite's Summer Jams

 I saw the summer playlists in the latest Main Street the other day and it inspired me to make my own, but then again who doesn’t have a few favorite summer jams? My list is highly influenced by summer parties and late night sing-a-longs by a campfire. I think Americana-folk-rock or whatever you want to call it is way under appreciated at UNH and it is some of my  personal favroite summer time music. I also threw in some reggae with "Nonsensical" (which was an inspiration in the blog title) and some hip-hop with one of my all-time favorites "The Seed 2.0" by The Roots.

1. Nonsensical – Forro in the Dark
2. Lookin’ Out my Back Door – Credence Clearwater Revival
3. Frankie’s Gun – The Felice Brothers
4. Wagon Wheel – Old Crow Medicine Show
5. The Other Side – Ryan Bingham
6. Burning Down the House – The Talking Heads
7. Immigraniada (We Comin' Rougher) – Gogol Bordello
8. Scarlet Begonias– Grateful Dead
9. The Seed 2.0 – The Roots
10. One Big Holiday – My Morning Jacket
11. Leaving Tennessee – Dusty Rhodes and the River Band
12. Up on Cripple Creak – The Band
13. Dirty Old Town – The Pogues
14. Lawyers, Guns and Money –Warren Zevon

I don't have the energy to make a fancy playlist like Lady Meow. I had a final this morning, moved into my new house and was fishing all afternoon. Somebody get me a Jack and Coke because this summer is going to kickass.

Stay classy, not Umassy.

Summer Goals and Predictions

Ok, the main point of this post it to test out the new features of the blog I added this morning. If you didn't notice you can now "like" and "retweet" each post. Hopefully this will help create more reader feedback and involvement so don't be shy and share the love if you're on facebook or twitter. Now I would like to share some of my summer goals:

• Make money
• catch fish (largemouth bass baby!)
• discover my inner cowboy by frequently getting sloppy drunk on whiskey 
• investigate t-shirts for next year
• find stuff to write about so the blog doesn't die.

Speaking of that final bullet point, does anyone have any suggestions for summer postings and to keep the blog active? I would love to be able to, but it is hard to find inspiration when I'm not on campus. I'm sure stuff will come up. One of my brothers recommended a competition, but I don't have any clue what it would be about, how to judge it or what the prize would be. Possibly a free t-shirt when and if I ever make them? For now I would recommend following/friending/liking us on facebook and twitter and when you comment make use a name or ID instead of just 'anonymous.' You don't have to make an account or anything you can enter a name anytime you comment. That will help us track regular commenters and that could come into play if there were ever to be an actual prize (even if it is just a certificate in next years "award ceremony"). 

I also have a few predictions for next year at UNH:

• UNH football will have another great season. Last year they were the best team in CAA North and it looks like they have only improved on that. I believe they will be a serious contender for the FCS championship. 
• Men's Basketball will be a top 3 team in America East. They are returning all of their starters from a decent team and I think Ferg Myrick will develop into the best player UNH has seen in a while.
• Men's hockey will have a better regular season record than this past year. Despite losing Hobey Baker finalist Bobby Butler and goalie Brian Foster I believe the team will be more well balanced. Mike Sislo and Paul Thompson will be ready to lead the offense and Stevie Moses will have the break-out year I expected him to have last year if he can stay healthy. Greg Burke should continue to improve on his freshman campaign, which showed his true potential late in the season. He could be the team's next big playmaker over his final three seasons. Blake Kessel will anchor a defense that was very inexperienced last year and should only improve. They might not be the top seed in Hockey East again, but they will have a better record. 
• SCOPE will get a rapper. MGMT and Girl Talk were awesome, but they know to switch it up.

Okay, I've been studying (kicking ass in NHL '09) all day and that is all I can think of right now. Share any predictions you have in the comment section below!

Stay classy, not UMassy.