What the fuck? I woke up this morning in a puddle of urine. Then i had to run to the bathroom to dry heave furiously. My heads on fire, n i just checked and its only Wednesday i hafta go to class? Oh, and i cant figure out why "build me up buttercup" is stuck in my head [sic].Ladies and gentlemen, I give you my best friend since first grade. Let's take a moment to dissect this text, because this is the type of shit my friends have to deal with. Never become close friends with an asshole blogger.
Obviously it is a hungover/drunk text so I'll leave most of the major grammar issues aside. I thoroughly enjoyed his word choice of "dry heave furiously." I can't help but laugh at the image of someone dry heaving "furiously." There aren't many things that one does "furiously" and dry heave is not one of them. The question mark in "its only Wednesday i hafta go to class?" is also quite remarkable.
The fact that he also woke up in a puddle of urine and unaware of what day it also made me laugh. Quite possibly because he woke up in a puddle of urine. Hey, shit happens. I guess piss does too.
The only part that didn't surprise me is that "build me up buttercup" was stuck in his head. Because when I get drunk I enjoy putting that on the jukebox at the various bars around Durham. You're welcome.
You can't help, but singalong!