Like a Pro: Thanksgiving

"Like a Pro" can be found in the Tuesday issues of the UNH student newspaper "The New Hampshire." This is the original, uncut, and unedited version.

It is that time of year again when Americans are encouraged to pause their busy lives and take moment to do some holiday shopping. I mean, give thanks for everything we have. When I was younger I used to be thankful for my idols like Batman, the Power Rangers, and Nomar Garciaparra, but as I have matured I have learned that there are far more important things that I should be thankful for. Especially since I now realize that two of those things were not real and the third probably did steroids.

This year I am not thankful for specific people or events, I am thankful for who I am. I guess the simplest way to put it is that I am a student at a great university, which provides huge opportunities for my future. Do not get me wrong; the university has made its share of mistakes – like once again scheduling classes on the Wednesday before Thanksgiving.

Luckily, like every other year I have been here, all of my professors cancelled those classes. When will the administration realize this and just officially give us the extra day off? Hey, at least we still have our football team, right Northeastern?

I am also thankful that I’m not the one out of the roughly 12,000 undergraduates at UNH who was arrested for receiving marijuana through the mail last week. That ratio is pretty strong in the university’s favor; maybe Heath Services should print that on those cards in Holloway. That would look better than admitting about 70 percent of campus drinks alcohol on the weekends. I think it is safe to say that we are all thankful we were not that one student, unless of course, he is reading this.

I do not want to be my super cliché self by saying what I am thankful for, like cheap alcohol and other mind-morphing substances, but instead slightly more serious things around campus.

I am thankful for Kurt’s Lunchbox because this time of year when the weather is cold, walking to DHOP can be treacherous. A nice order of cheesy fries will warm you right up without trekking all the way downtown. Depending on where you live Wildcatessen and the Philbrook Café serve as great cold weather alternatives too. Sure, their respected atmospheres do not match up to DHOP, but at least you will get some food.

With finals just around the corner, I am also thankful that the library is open until 2 a.m. 
More importantly, I am thankful for classes that do not have finals, because one less final means one more night of me being a campus statistic about alcohol consumption. Perhaps what I am most thankful for, in regards to finals, is knowing ahead of time that I can pass a class no matter how badly I do on the final. That really takes the pressure off so I recommend that you all try and calculate your grades before finals week. Why would you want to waste your time studying, I mean this is college right?

As much as I have ripped on the police forces of UNH and Durham, I am thankful that they do not have quite the same thirst for power as some other local units.

Some of you may have heard about the party at Colby-Sawyer College in New London that resulted in 105 underage drinking arrests, 55 of which were internal possession. Here at UNH the police usually just send us on our way after breaking up a party, only arresting a select few, if any.

Too often students at UNH (especially me) complain about every little thing such as poorly prioritized police officers, overrated parties, over-hyped concerts, the administration, the alcohol policy, the terribleness of blackboard, overpaid coaches, violence, pointless course requirements, unbalanced heating systems, lack of ATMs on campus, parking issues, H1N1, rising tuition costs and the advising system, just to name a few.

I feel that is very important to think about what we do have because any large college campus in the country will have dozens of similar issues that UNH students complain about.

Stay classy, not UMassy.